Wednesday, January 24, 2007

A deep-frozen car and an annoying detective

Mood: still annoyed
Weather: cold and snowy
Drinking: black coffee with sugar
Eating: the chocolate covered marshmallows I snatched from said detective
Listening to: I'm not the man - 10,000 Maniacs


This morning was cold.
Frigging cold.
Incredibly cold!

After I slighlty woke up in the middle of the night 'cause James cuddled me madly and covered my face with kisses I just dozed off into a light slumber and woke up early. It was somewhere around 6am and I arose, had a shower and percolated coffee.
Rummaging through the cupboards and the fridge I found what I wanted and prepared French Toast for breakfast.
Just when I wanted to raise James from his sleep he plodded into the kitchen rubbing the sleep from his eyes. "Morn...", he murmured and stretched a bit. He does not know what this sight does with me I think.
"Morning, cuddly wuddly", I grinned at him and set the table. "Coffee's ready and the French Toast in a minute. Sit down and wake up, hun."
James looked at me a bit sleepy and sat down shaking his head. "What happened that you are awake and already prepared breakfast?"
I poured the coffee and shrugged. "Dunno, I just felt like it."
Then I served the French Toast and sat down, too.
James smiled at me. "I had no objections if you felt like it more often."
I sneered at him. "No way turning me into your little wife", I pointed at him.
James chuckled. "Ah...no...I wouldn't want that. I love my sweet grumpy husband too much."
"See?", I answered and blitzed the toast.
James shook his head. "There it is again - my demolition bomb..."
"I'm hungry", I replied still chewing and showed him the chewed remains in my mouth with an "Haaaaargh!"
"Ukk!", James exclaimed and raised his hand. "I don't want to see that!"
"I know", I snickered and sipped my coffee.
I behaved the rest of our breakfast and I cleared up while James showered and dressed.

When we went out the cold air hit us like a hammer. "Geez!", I exclaimed. "I want to curl up in bed again! This is disgusting!"
I rubbed my hands and watched James who tried to open his car. The driver's door was frozen, the passenger door, too.
"See?", I pouted. "The car does not want to leave either. Let's stay at home."
James rolled his eyes. "Lazyass..."
He tried one of the backdoors and finally managed to open the one on the left side.
"Hah!", he exclaimed, threw his bag to the passenger seat and climbed from the backseat to the driver's seat.
I giggled. "You look silly. But I got a nice view of your sweet little ass!"
"Just shut up and come in!", he replied. "It's cold and I want to shut the doors."
"Okay...but don't expect me to climb to the passenger seat", I said and sat down on the backseat of the car.
When I closed the door I put on a snobby expression and pointed ahead with my cane.
"James, to hospital please!"
First he gasped but then just replied "Very well, Sir", and started the engine. So I had my personal chauffeur to PPTH this morning.

Sitting at my desk and flipping through some files I tried to think of something mean and embarassing I could do to Dr. Marks who took up employment at OBGYN today.
My thoughts were interrupted by Foreman who asked me if I could accompany him seeing a patient. I hate such visits but my ducklings always have their reasons when they call me to someone.
The guy promised to become an interesting case and I limped backwards to my office still talking to Foreman who stood at the door to our common room. I saw him gesturing but it was too late. I "ran" into someone who cussed and dropped a file.
"Oooooops!", I said and turned to the man who gathered his papers and glared at me.
"Ooops? Can't you just pay attention?"
I grinned at the grumpy face and shrugged. "Did someone have bad sex last night?"
"My sex life is none of your business!", he snapped and bobbed up. "Go and get yourself some illegal prescriptions and mind your own business!"
I congratulated myself for pissing someone off so quickly.
"Bad sex or no sex for months", I smirked. This must have been the detective from Boston. I heard some rumors about two boys who have been shot down and were his case now. "And I don't think you're here because of illegal subscriptions", I continued eyeing the file in his hands. I was nosy, I have to admit.
"Your luck I am not!", he gnarled and put the file into his jacket. Too bad. Now I wasn't able to spot anything.
"I could do with a coffee now. How about you?", I asked with my brightest smile. He shrugged and took the bait. "Yeah...why not..." He seemed to think I wanted to apologize but I just wanted to catch a glimpse of his file.
"This way", I grinned and headed for the cafeteria. Foreman watched us passing by and shook his head at me.
When I sat down I said "Black coffee with sugar, please. Your treat."
The man grunted, rolled his eyes and went to the counter. When he came back he put a mug in front of me and slammed a tray to the table. Two Reubens!
I was surprised. "How did you know?"
He shrugged and unwrapped his sandwich. "Every doctor I know is crazy for Reubens. You're Dr. House, right?"
"Er...yes...", I replied and fought to unwrap my sandwhich.
"Thought so", he said. "Read the name on the door to your office. I'm Detective Woody Hoyt."
Food seemed to lift up his bad mood. I didn't answer, forgot to say 'Thank you' and took a bite from my Reuben. "UKK!", I exclaimed and dropped it to the table. "It has pickles!" I looked at it as if it was crap on toast. Shivering with disgust I removed them and offered them to Hoyt. "Want some? But not this one, I chewed on it."
He took a deep breath. "You do not bother to thank me, let me pay for your coffee and your damn Reuben and just complain about pickles?! I'm not in the mood for such crap now! Didn't sleep for more than 30 hours and have to wait for a victim to wake up!"
Now that my Reuben wasn't contaminated anymore I took a hearty bite, leaned back and munched happily. Subway has better Reubens but this one was for free - never look a gift horse in the mouth.
"Are you always grumpy like that?", I then asked. "I'm not in need of competition! You need your victim to wake up? A little adrenaline could help that", I smirked.
"Don't you dare!", he spat. "I'm not grumpy, I just want to go home!"
"Sooo bitchy!", I answered and rolled my eyes towards the ceiling. "I was just trying to help you. Believe me or not, I have my nice moments. Now it's over, I'm sorry."
I leaned back in my chair again. "Thank you by the way! What exciting things are waiting for you at home? A puppy dog? An empty appartment? You look as if you'd nearly fall asleep on that chair."
He finished his sandwhich and smashed the tray to the table angrily. "A bed! That's waht's waiting for me!"
I saved my sandwhich from being crushed by the tray and just shook my head. "A bed...really exciting", I mumbled and took another bite.
I was curious about the victim but knew Detective Hoyt would not tell me anything at all. But there was that file...
"What if I offer you the couch at my office? It's quite comfortable. You could have a nap and stop being grouchy."
"I'm no moron!", Hoyt grunted and glared at me again. "As soon as I'm asleep you'll snatch my file, I see how nosy you are."
Rats! He got me.
"This really hurts, you know that? As if I snatched files! Put it in your pants if you want when you lay down!", I pouted and tried to hide my disappointment.
I so would snatch it even out of his pants.
Hoyt snorted. "Of course. I'm sure someone would grab into my pants then!"
I shot him an indignant look. "You really think I'd let my hand slip in your pants? No way!"
In fact I had thought of asking Foreman to do so and I was damn sure that Foreman was capable of snatching the file without Hoyt noticing it.
"If you would I'd shove your cane in your ass!", he snapped and I grinned.
"I'd rather have other things shoved in my ass than my cane", I chuckled and thought of last night.
Hoyt just shook his head and stomped out of the cafetaria.
Shoot! The file was gone with him.

I walked back to my office and found a part of his file that slipped beneath my door when he dropped it. With a broad grin I noticed it was the case. After I read it I hid it under my fern and went to James whisteling a tune...

4 Comments:

Blogger Unknown said...

Is there anything else I can do for you, Sir?

January 24, 2007  
Blogger Dr. Gregory House said...

Un...yes!
Would you please come over to my office?
I have some new instructions for you, James.

January 25, 2007  
Blogger Unknown said...

You dare it now? After your silly "joke"?

January 25, 2007  
Blogger Dr. Edward J. Marks said...

Frozen car? Thats why I take my bike.

January 25, 2007  

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