Danby's birthday - Part I

Mood: it's Monday...do I need to say more?
Weather: snowing and cold
Drinking: coffee
Listening to: Fallen leaves - Billy Talent

Monday again.
Life sucks on Mondays.
You know that.
We all know that.
I bet you don't feel any better today.

But this monday started oh so pleasant and cuddly, you just can't imagine. I still feel like walking on cotton candy. Apart from Friday this weekend was really nice.

It was Danby's 40th (was it? I suppose so...) birthday on Saturday and he invited James and me, the ducklings, colleagues from the Oncology and a bunch of friends and relatives to dinner and afterwards to the Irish Pub on main street.
Yes, he really had his Scottish family there and I hoped for some bottles of Scottish Single Malt, so I was really looking forward to the evening.
The whole Saturday was one big enjoyableness. James pampered me all through the day, hugged and cuddled me and asked time and again if I was alright.
He's so sweet and sometimes I think I just don't deserve him.
Aw, I know he'll hate to read this...I'm sorry, hun, but it's just what I think sometimes.

Where was I? Saturday...right.
After a day filled to the brim with cuddling, snuggling and..ehm..other things we prepared for dinner around 6 pm. James made me wear a suit - this one, if you remember it:

And I think I looked as happy to wear it as on this photograph.
"Don't be stubborn, hun! It's his 40th birthday and it's a dinner!"
"Yes, and afterwards it's Irish pub!", I griped. "We'll be slightly overdressed there..."
"You know we won't...You can wear whatever you want there!"
I kept pouting and searched for my black sneakers. "Have you seen them?"
"Seen what?", James asked with an innocent smile.
"My black sneakers..."
His smile grew broader. "Maybe I've seen them. And maybe I hid them..."
I bobbed up and raised an eyebrow. "Hid them...huh?"
James crossed his arms. "You know why. I'm not in the mood for this discussion again, dear."
I sighed deeply and sat down on my side of our bed. As meek as a lamb I put on my black leather shoes and looked up at him with puppy eyes afterwards.
"But you know I can't walk too good in them..."
"Aw!", James exclaimed. "Such a shabby excuse. You can't walk too good in either shoes."
Cruel but true.
I sighed again, got up and took a few dashes of Eternity. "Fine then...I'm ready..."
"Great timing...the cab is already waiting", Jim said after looking out of the kitchen window. He handed me my coat and off we were.

It was snowing outside and James seemed to fear I wasn't able to reach the cab safely and backed me. I grinned. "I have a cane and I know how to use it..."
He slightly blushed as we entered the taxi. "I just thought there could be black ice", he mumbled and I turned to him with a bright smile.
He couldn't resist, leaned forward and kissed me. Exactly what I wanted.
The cab driver pretended not to notice and drove us to Danby's place.
It was a house he hired a bit outside of the town. James paid the cab driver and I already approached the garden gate where I stopped and waited for him.
"It looks nice", I said when James joined me there. He looked over to the house and nodded. "Yipp. He plans to buy it when he's sure he wants to stay here."
We opened the gate and walked up to the house.
Obviously someone feasted a bacchanalia with road salt some time ago 'cause there was no snow to be seen on the narrow path to the house and it scrunched beneath our feet.
I grinned. "Maybe he thought there could be black ice..."
James stopped and slapped my head. "Menace!"
I tutted at him. "You are so brutal sometimes..."
We had reached the door and James adjusted my coat before we rang the door bell.
We could hear babbling and music from the inside and soon tapping feet in the hallway. It was Danby (of course) who answered the door.
"Good evening!", he beamed. "I'm so glad you could come!"
We said our happy birthdays and walked into the hallway.
That was where I froze. The hallway was a nightmare which has become real. Think of the worsest things you know about British interior design and exponentiate it with 15 however-you-measure-nightmares. Then - and just then - you have a faint idea of how this hallway looked like. James told me not to play the woman later but it was horrible!
Judge yourself:

I stood there with my mouth slightly open and didn't even notice Danby took my coat. An elderly lady who was apparently nosy who had arrived peeped around the corner and examined me with a smile and clapped her hands with pleasure.
"Right!", she said, "Isn't this hallway charming? The good boy really feels nice interior in his bones!"
She most obviously misjudged my facial expression. Not so James. He gave me a warning side glance and slightly squeezed my hand. I closed my mouth, turned to the old lady and forced a smile on my face.
Surprisingly nimble she darted over to us and shook our hands. "I'm Sammy's aunt Maude", she beamed at us. "You are colleagues and friends, I suppose? He looked so happy to see you."
Her Scottish accent was funny and I nodded with a grin. "Dr. Gregory House", I introduced myself. "Head of the department of Diagnostic Medicine. And this ray of sunshine here is Dr. James Wilson, head of Oncology."
Her eyes widened and her smile broadened. "Ooooh...so you're Sammyboy's boss! Nice to meet you - both of you. I'm glad he's surrounded by such nice people."
She paddled ahead and gestured us to follow her.
On our way to the sitting-room we passed a hideous dresser:

I looked at James and raised an eyebrow, but he just hit my ribs with his elbow.

We followed Aunt Maude into an unspeakable and crowded sitting-room. Apparantly we were the last guests to arrive. His whole familiy seemed to be there, the ducklings were there (except Cameron, so we were not the last guests this evening), some members of the Oncology and his friends.
We were greeted with hoopla and nodded to everybody.
"Bou ane's hoch!", Aunt Maude smiled at us.
Our expression clearly showed a "Huh?" on our faces and big question marks above our heads.
Danby laughed. "Sit down, she means!" He offered us two chairs next to each other and I found myself sitting in a Laura-Ashley-nightmare. Flowers as far as the eye could see.
Flowers on the wallpaper,
flowers on the carpets,
flowers on the table cloth,
flowers on the dishes,
flowers on the blouse of Danby's grandma.
This was the total flower overdose and the colors reached from pink over mauve and rose to light blue. I was still gawking and felt slightly sick somewhere deep in my stomach.
James read my expression very well, took my hand underneath the table and squeezed it again. "I know", he whispered, "it's..."
He was searching for the right words.
"Hideous!", I whispered back.
James fought down a giggle and nodded. "Right", he spoke under his breath.

"Allow me to introduce my boss Dr. James Wilson and Dr. Gregory House", Danby then interrupted my trail of thoughts. I hated such official things but maybe the Brits love it. We were introduced to his friends and family and I was surprised his sister Gràinne was married to a woman. He never told us but then...why should he?
They were both very nice and fairly pretty.
I then turned to greet Danby's parents. His mother was named Kenna, his father's name was Sionn. Obviously that family thought to spare their son one of these old Scottish names.
His grandma had something very odd on her head. It was something that looked like spun sugar. Something you stare at for hours until you recognize 'Oh! It's hair!'
But she was a really nice old lady, witty and funny.
The door bell rang again and it was Cameron who finally arrived.
She dropped a brick when she introduced herself as the only straight member of my team to Danby's sister with a lackadaisical laughter and I didn't bother to fight down a mean snicker.
When she sat down and the blush vanished from her face the dinner was served. It was simply delicious and an animated conversation started on the crowded table.
"Yir eens bigger nor yir belly!", we suddenly heard Aunt Maude say to Chase and believe me - we all understood what she meant. I snickered again and my eyes met those of a friend of Danby's who sat obliquely opposite from me. The poor guy suddenly snorted with laughter and spillt wine on his shirt. Apart from the wine stains he looked as if he just stepped out of a Merchant/Ivory movie and reminded me of James Wilby. "Obviously British", I thought and turned to my meal again.

After dinner we had Brandy and cigars and I began to feel like in an old English Gentlemen's club or something. I limped through the unspeakable house and found an unspeakable bedroom as well:

I just had to show James who grumbled at my curiosity but couldn't help chuckling. "Unbelievable", he gasped and I guided him to the bathroom:

"This is the room I like most in this house", I pondered. "No flowers..."
James nodded slowly. "Yeeees...but still...pompous and...."
"Weird?"
"Yes..."
We walked back into the sitting-room and joined Chase and Foreman sitting down in some hideous armchairs:

I'm so sorry to spoil your mood with these pictures...but I just have to show this. Otherwise you'd think I'd be touchy.
He even had hideous porcellain candleholders with - guess what? - flowers on them.
I was pondering how sick a mind has to be to design such things when I was interrupted by 'James Wilby' who asked me if I'd look through Danby's CDs with him and choose some good music. I shrugged and arose. Why not? Maybe he even has hideous music...this would be rather interesting.
James raised an eyebrow but did not want to accompany me.

So I delved among CDs with 'Wilby' who introduced himself as Tristan Calough from Edinborough. To my own surprise Danby had really good music, so not all of his taste was disastrous. 'Tris', as he called himself, was delighted he liked the same music as me and started to talk my ear off. More than once I turned to James seeking help but he just grinned at me and shrugged.
But when 'Tris' put his arm around my waist James was on his feet and darted over to us at speed of light. No grinning and shrugging anymore now.
"So you introduced yourself to my husband yet", he said with a fake agreeable smile. I was relieved he was there and snuggled into his embrace.
"Um...oh...I...I...yes, I did, I suppose", Calough stammered and blushed deeply.
"Fine", James replied and kept smiling. "I'm Dr. James Wilson..."
Calough nodded and offered him his hand. "T...Tristan Calough. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to...to..."
"To make a grab at him?", James asked with a silky smile.
"Um...maybe. Yes."
"So...excuse us now", James answered and guided me away from him.
I fought down a giggle and at the same time I was slightly impressed. I was not the only one who was a bit jealous, hm?
Jim frowned. "Geez, I hate it when someone is trying to paw on you!"
I beamed at him. "Then kiss me here in front of all guests and make it perfectly clear you're my husband", I proposed not really altruistic.
He didn't bother to answer but held me close and kissed me in a way that almost swept me from my feet.

Yes, this evening was very pleasant.