He's here

To make a long story short: Mole is here.
He's looking for me and I locked my office.
I feel sick!
The blinds are closed and I hope he won't suspect me in here.
(Why should he? There's only my name on that fucking door!)

I think I'll leave over the balcony taking the key with me.
I'll write again tomorrow.

Danby's birthday - Part II or Foreman's dark secrets

Mood: annoyed!
Weather: overcast and cold
Drinking: coffee
Eating: a sandwich with chocolate cream
Listening to: Down in the past - Mando Diao

I'm annoyed.
"Tell me some news" you say?
Well, I am and I have a damn good reason for it.
Cuddy imposed clinic duty on me once again.
Not the usual three hours, no.
8 - verbal eight - hours today!
The whole fucking day!
I don't know what I did to her and why the world hates me so much.

The day already started rotten. Okay, when I got up I was in a good mood - I don't know why. I just was good-humored, fetched new clothes, had a shower and when I was ready I heard James knocking on the bathroom door.
"Breakfast is ready, Greg!"
Awfully cheerful I shouted back. "Moooooooooorning, hun!"
I came out fully dressed and surrounded by the silly smell of strawberry shampoo and sat down at the breakfast table.
"Mmmmmh, breakfast sounds good to me! I could eat like a horse!"
James giggled and turned the pages of his newspaper. "So you want some pellets?", he asked.
"Pellets?", I replied. "Um...no. I'd prefer some scrambled egg on toast or...your pancakes. But all I can see are pellets! These are cereals... Want me to eat healthy?"
I looked down on the cereals with disgust. "And don't look so decent behind your newspaper", I added then.
James looked up and grinned. "Aw, c'mon cereals are good for you!"
"They're not even candied", I griped and tried them. "Ukk! Tastes like cardboard!
Now...where's the real breakfast?"
James grinned, arose and opened the oven. "Scrambled eggs with bacon for you, Sir!", he bowed and I gasped with relief.
"I knew you couldn't be so cruel", I smiled and sniffed. "Hmmm...this smells gorgeous..." I glanced at the cereals again. "Are these cereals? Or is it really cardboard?"
James put the eggs on the table with his most innocent facial expression. "What do you think?" The corners of his mouth twitched and he started laughing.
I stared at him with disbelief. I then examined the 'cereals' closer. "This..." First I was lost for words and pouted. "This is so mean! You made me eat cardboard! You'll never talk me into eating healthy food if you scare me with such things..."
James sat down again and just snickered. "Sorry, but I just couldn't resist."
My mouth was slightly opened and I stared at him. "How long have you been awake tearing cardboard into cereal-size pieces, hm?"
He pretended to think about my question. "Stood up at 5 am, couldn't sleep any more. Someone played silk worm again", he winked at me. "So I prepared the breakfast."
"Plenty of time for preparing 'cereals'...and sorry for the silk worm", I mumbled and started to eat the eggs which were delicious. It's amazing how good he cooks. He can turn even scrambled eggs into a feast, believe me.
So I was conciliated with the rotten start into this day again and my good mood came back just to vanish when I turned up here.

But I don't want to bore you with all the things that tend to annoy me.
Do I hear someone breathing out with great relief?
Hm?
Do I?
No, I'm not pissed off.
I'm just annoyed.
But you already knew that.

Right, I still have to tell my readers about the remains of the evening with Danby, his friends and relatives.
It was the Irish Pub on the main street we were heading to after having dinner and a cigar. Chase was not feeling too good and he already left our 'small' party, much to the despair of Foreman who was encouraged to stay with us.
We sat down on a round biiiiig table and I was the first to order a pint of Guinness. James contented himself with Cider and Foreman dared a half pint of Guinness.
I just leaned back and enjoyed James caressing my back for a while and had no intention to join the common babbling until James stopped petting me and got absorbed in some conversation. I sighed and odered a Snakebite and Foreman and me considered to order some pasta. (Yeah, after the dinner...call us cormorants!)
We were talking to each other and happily munching our meals when I noticed Foreman's behavior slightly changed and he seemed to feel a bit uncomfortable.
I looked up and searched the pub for anyone we knew and didn't want to see but couldn't spot a single loony.
"Is everything okay, Foreman?", I asked nosily.
He shrugged and seemed to try to hide underneath the table.
"Okay...I suppose this was a 'no'", I smirked. "Will you show me who you are trying to avoid?"
Foreman leaned over to me and whispered "Do you remember I told you about that gardener who backbit I...we..."
"Ah!", I grinned and raised an eyebrow. "The one who said he went down on you!"
Foreman's cheeks darkened and I suppose this was a blush. "Psh! You are...unbelievable sometimes! Why not stand up and yell it through the pub?!", he hissed.
I shrugged and arose what made him grab my arm and pull me down to my chair again. "This was a rhetorical question, House!!!"
"Aw...I see... I would have done so if you wanted me to..."
Foreman nodded fiercly. "I believe you!"
I picked my pasta and gave Foreman a sideglance. "So...he's here?"
Foreman seemed to wish for Alice's shrinking juice and slowly nodded again. "Yes...over there. And he already saw me."
I looked 'over there' with a cursory glance and spotted a handsome man in his early thirties with blonde hair wearing a green jumper. He was talking to a darkhaired guy I recognized as PPTH's chief gardener. He was not too absorbed in his conversation and looked over to Foreman time and again.
With a cheeky look I smirked and waved to him what made him raise his eyebrows, smile and wave back to me.
"HOUSE!!!!!, Foreman hissed again and I'm sure if I wasn't his boss he'd smacked me.
"What?", I turned to him with an innocent look. "I just tried to be nice. I recognized him."
"You what? C'mon! You don't give a shit to the gardeners!"
"So you think I'm snobbish, hm?"
"No, I think you're a pain in the ass!", he angrily whispered to me and suddenly grinned. "But hey...he turned his attention to you now obviously."
I looked up from my meal and promptly met his eyes. "Fuck!", I mumbled and looked down the very same second.
Foreman snickered and took a hearty morsel of his pasta, apparently in a better mood now.
I peeped up again and he was still looking at me. "Noooooo", I moaned and pretended to be totally absorbed in my meal.
When Foreman looked up the next time he went pale if this is possible with him. "Oh...crap! He comes over to us!"
I closed my eyes for a second.
Nonononononononono....
He reached our table and smiled down to us. "Hey, Eric", he then greeted Foreman.
"Hey, Darryl", Foreman replied with a not so happy smile.
"Long time no see", Darryl continued with a somewhat sad expression in his eyes.
Foreman shrugged and chose to say nothing at all.
Darryl then turned to me. "So...you are Dr. Chase?"
I almost spat the piece of tenderloin back on my plate and coughed. "No!", I exclaimed and looked up to him. "I'm Dr. House."
"Oh, I'm sorry. Nice to meet you, Dr. House!" He offered me his hand which I ignored.
"Um...hello",I answered. "What on earth made you think I was Chase?"
He shrugged a bit. "Well...Chase is Foreman's new....boyfriend and you two sat there and talked to each other....so I thought..."
"I am talking to many people", I gnarled.
"I'm sorry again. You just seemed to get along well..." He then turned to Foreman again. "Why did you do that to me, Eric?"
Foreman was obviously wishing for relocating powers. "Do what?"
"Run away! After we kissed and I told you I love you!"
I perked up my ears and grinned. So this was no rumor at all but the truth!
"I...well...I...."
"You got scared!"
"Maybe..."
"And now you're with Dr. Robert Chase and not scared at all!"
"This is something different...."
"Is it?"
Foreman nodded helplessly and Darryl bobbed up. He took a deep breath and turned to me. "I'm glad you are not Dr. Chase!"
I grinned. "So am I! But why you?"
He eyed me from head to toe. "You are sexy!"
I pretended not to feel awkward. "Um...thanks..."
"Is he taken?", Darryl turned to Foreman and I wondered why he did not ask me.
"Yes. He is!", James suddenly caught the speaker's eye.
Now it was darryl's turn to blush. "Sorry. What a pity. So...um...bye then...have a nice evening."
We all three nodded and he went back to the darkhaired guy he was talking to before.
Two heads turned to Foreman again.
"So you broke his little heart, eh?", I smiled at him as sweet as sugar.
Forman watched his fingers for a while. "I...this was a year ago or so. I always thought he was flirting with me. I just talked to him and we ended up kissing on the backseat of his car. He told me he loved me and I ran away."
"Interesting", I nodded. "Why?"
"I didn't want people to think I'm gay!"
I couldn't help laughing. "Foreman! You are with Chase now!"
"This is something different! And please don't tell him! He'll kill me, I know that."
"Kill you? This was long before you and him..."
"Yes, but...just don't tell him, okay?"
I promised.

Okay...actually I didn't tell him, right?
I just wrote about it in my blog.

I think it's strange

...there are quizzes like this on the internet.


You are... Dr. Greg House! You are reserved, and a little grumpy. But you are in love, so you pretend to hate the world so no one knows. You are a complete softie, but only on the inside. You think it's a bad thing and don't want anyone to know. and you have the best sense of humor ever. you rock!
Take this quiz!

Danby's birthday - Part I

Mood: it's Monday...do I need to say more?
Weather: snowing and cold
Drinking: coffee
Listening to: Fallen leaves - Billy Talent

Monday again.
Life sucks on Mondays.
You know that.
We all know that.
I bet you don't feel any better today.

But this monday started oh so pleasant and cuddly, you just can't imagine. I still feel like walking on cotton candy. Apart from Friday this weekend was really nice.

It was Danby's 40th (was it? I suppose so...) birthday on Saturday and he invited James and me, the ducklings, colleagues from the Oncology and a bunch of friends and relatives to dinner and afterwards to the Irish Pub on main street.
Yes, he really had his Scottish family there and I hoped for some bottles of Scottish Single Malt, so I was really looking forward to the evening.
The whole Saturday was one big enjoyableness. James pampered me all through the day, hugged and cuddled me and asked time and again if I was alright.
He's so sweet and sometimes I think I just don't deserve him.
Aw, I know he'll hate to read this...I'm sorry, hun, but it's just what I think sometimes.

Where was I? Saturday...right.
After a day filled to the brim with cuddling, snuggling and..ehm..other things we prepared for dinner around 6 pm. James made me wear a suit - this one, if you remember it:

And I think I looked as happy to wear it as on this photograph.
"Don't be stubborn, hun! It's his 40th birthday and it's a dinner!"
"Yes, and afterwards it's Irish pub!", I griped. "We'll be slightly overdressed there..."
"You know we won't...You can wear whatever you want there!"
I kept pouting and searched for my black sneakers. "Have you seen them?"
"Seen what?", James asked with an innocent smile.
"My black sneakers..."
His smile grew broader. "Maybe I've seen them. And maybe I hid them..."
I bobbed up and raised an eyebrow. "Hid them...huh?"
James crossed his arms. "You know why. I'm not in the mood for this discussion again, dear."
I sighed deeply and sat down on my side of our bed. As meek as a lamb I put on my black leather shoes and looked up at him with puppy eyes afterwards.
"But you know I can't walk too good in them..."
"Aw!", James exclaimed. "Such a shabby excuse. You can't walk too good in either shoes."
Cruel but true.
I sighed again, got up and took a few dashes of Eternity. "Fine then...I'm ready..."
"Great timing...the cab is already waiting", Jim said after looking out of the kitchen window. He handed me my coat and off we were.

It was snowing outside and James seemed to fear I wasn't able to reach the cab safely and backed me. I grinned. "I have a cane and I know how to use it..."
He slightly blushed as we entered the taxi. "I just thought there could be black ice", he mumbled and I turned to him with a bright smile.
He couldn't resist, leaned forward and kissed me. Exactly what I wanted.
The cab driver pretended not to notice and drove us to Danby's place.
It was a house he hired a bit outside of the town. James paid the cab driver and I already approached the garden gate where I stopped and waited for him.
"It looks nice", I said when James joined me there. He looked over to the house and nodded. "Yipp. He plans to buy it when he's sure he wants to stay here."
We opened the gate and walked up to the house.
Obviously someone feasted a bacchanalia with road salt some time ago 'cause there was no snow to be seen on the narrow path to the house and it scrunched beneath our feet.
I grinned. "Maybe he thought there could be black ice..."
James stopped and slapped my head. "Menace!"
I tutted at him. "You are so brutal sometimes..."
We had reached the door and James adjusted my coat before we rang the door bell.
We could hear babbling and music from the inside and soon tapping feet in the hallway. It was Danby (of course) who answered the door.
"Good evening!", he beamed. "I'm so glad you could come!"
We said our happy birthdays and walked into the hallway.
That was where I froze. The hallway was a nightmare which has become real. Think of the worsest things you know about British interior design and exponentiate it with 15 however-you-measure-nightmares. Then - and just then - you have a faint idea of how this hallway looked like. James told me not to play the woman later but it was horrible!
Judge yourself:

I stood there with my mouth slightly open and didn't even notice Danby took my coat. An elderly lady who was apparently nosy who had arrived peeped around the corner and examined me with a smile and clapped her hands with pleasure.
"Right!", she said, "Isn't this hallway charming? The good boy really feels nice interior in his bones!"
She most obviously misjudged my facial expression. Not so James. He gave me a warning side glance and slightly squeezed my hand. I closed my mouth, turned to the old lady and forced a smile on my face.
Surprisingly nimble she darted over to us and shook our hands. "I'm Sammy's aunt Maude", she beamed at us. "You are colleagues and friends, I suppose? He looked so happy to see you."
Her Scottish accent was funny and I nodded with a grin. "Dr. Gregory House", I introduced myself. "Head of the department of Diagnostic Medicine. And this ray of sunshine here is Dr. James Wilson, head of Oncology."
Her eyes widened and her smile broadened. "Ooooh...so you're Sammyboy's boss! Nice to meet you - both of you. I'm glad he's surrounded by such nice people."
She paddled ahead and gestured us to follow her.
On our way to the sitting-room we passed a hideous dresser:

I looked at James and raised an eyebrow, but he just hit my ribs with his elbow.

We followed Aunt Maude into an unspeakable and crowded sitting-room. Apparantly we were the last guests to arrive. His whole familiy seemed to be there, the ducklings were there (except Cameron, so we were not the last guests this evening), some members of the Oncology and his friends.
We were greeted with hoopla and nodded to everybody.
"Bou ane's hoch!", Aunt Maude smiled at us.
Our expression clearly showed a "Huh?" on our faces and big question marks above our heads.
Danby laughed. "Sit down, she means!" He offered us two chairs next to each other and I found myself sitting in a Laura-Ashley-nightmare. Flowers as far as the eye could see.
Flowers on the wallpaper,
flowers on the carpets,
flowers on the table cloth,
flowers on the dishes,
flowers on the blouse of Danby's grandma.
This was the total flower overdose and the colors reached from pink over mauve and rose to light blue. I was still gawking and felt slightly sick somewhere deep in my stomach.
James read my expression very well, took my hand underneath the table and squeezed it again. "I know", he whispered, "it's..."
He was searching for the right words.
"Hideous!", I whispered back.
James fought down a giggle and nodded. "Right", he spoke under his breath.

"Allow me to introduce my boss Dr. James Wilson and Dr. Gregory House", Danby then interrupted my trail of thoughts. I hated such official things but maybe the Brits love it. We were introduced to his friends and family and I was surprised his sister Gràinne was married to a woman. He never told us but then...why should he?
They were both very nice and fairly pretty.
I then turned to greet Danby's parents. His mother was named Kenna, his father's name was Sionn. Obviously that family thought to spare their son one of these old Scottish names.
His grandma had something very odd on her head. It was something that looked like spun sugar. Something you stare at for hours until you recognize 'Oh! It's hair!'
But she was a really nice old lady, witty and funny.
The door bell rang again and it was Cameron who finally arrived.
She dropped a brick when she introduced herself as the only straight member of my team to Danby's sister with a lackadaisical laughter and I didn't bother to fight down a mean snicker.
When she sat down and the blush vanished from her face the dinner was served. It was simply delicious and an animated conversation started on the crowded table.
"Yir eens bigger nor yir belly!", we suddenly heard Aunt Maude say to Chase and believe me - we all understood what she meant. I snickered again and my eyes met those of a friend of Danby's who sat obliquely opposite from me. The poor guy suddenly snorted with laughter and spillt wine on his shirt. Apart from the wine stains he looked as if he just stepped out of a Merchant/Ivory movie and reminded me of James Wilby. "Obviously British", I thought and turned to my meal again.

After dinner we had Brandy and cigars and I began to feel like in an old English Gentlemen's club or something. I limped through the unspeakable house and found an unspeakable bedroom as well:

I just had to show James who grumbled at my curiosity but couldn't help chuckling. "Unbelievable", he gasped and I guided him to the bathroom:

"This is the room I like most in this house", I pondered. "No flowers..."
James nodded slowly. "Yeeees...but still...pompous and...."
"Weird?"
"Yes..."
We walked back into the sitting-room and joined Chase and Foreman sitting down in some hideous armchairs:

I'm so sorry to spoil your mood with these pictures...but I just have to show this. Otherwise you'd think I'd be touchy.
He even had hideous porcellain candleholders with - guess what? - flowers on them.
I was pondering how sick a mind has to be to design such things when I was interrupted by 'James Wilby' who asked me if I'd look through Danby's CDs with him and choose some good music. I shrugged and arose. Why not? Maybe he even has hideous music...this would be rather interesting.
James raised an eyebrow but did not want to accompany me.

So I delved among CDs with 'Wilby' who introduced himself as Tristan Calough from Edinborough. To my own surprise Danby had really good music, so not all of his taste was disastrous. 'Tris', as he called himself, was delighted he liked the same music as me and started to talk my ear off. More than once I turned to James seeking help but he just grinned at me and shrugged.
But when 'Tris' put his arm around my waist James was on his feet and darted over to us at speed of light. No grinning and shrugging anymore now.
"So you introduced yourself to my husband yet", he said with a fake agreeable smile. I was relieved he was there and snuggled into his embrace.
"Um...oh...I...I...yes, I did, I suppose", Calough stammered and blushed deeply.
"Fine", James replied and kept smiling. "I'm Dr. James Wilson..."
Calough nodded and offered him his hand. "T...Tristan Calough. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to...to..."
"To make a grab at him?", James asked with a silky smile.
"Um...maybe. Yes."
"So...excuse us now", James answered and guided me away from him.
I fought down a giggle and at the same time I was slightly impressed. I was not the only one who was a bit jealous, hm?
Jim frowned. "Geez, I hate it when someone is trying to paw on you!"
I beamed at him. "Then kiss me here in front of all guests and make it perfectly clear you're my husband", I proposed not really altruistic.
He didn't bother to answer but held me close and kissed me in a way that almost swept me from my feet.

Yes, this evening was very pleasant.

Thinking of the misuse of ice wine bottles

Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And never brought to mind?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And auld lang syne?

Robert Burns

Yes!
By all means!
It should.
At least some of them.

Old acquaintances who live in noble houses with English lawn and well-kept front gardens.
Old acquaintances who wear expensive suits, shiny shoes and sugary nice smiles.
Old acquaintances who pretended to be nice for such a long time until they had you exactly where they wanted you to be.
Old acquaintances who puzzle your parents 'cause you suddenly scream your soul out when you meet them.

You never expect such people to live in your neighborhood. Next to your own house, inviting you for lemonade and tea and biding for the perfect moment.
Not in Belgravia.
Not in these noble and decent streets.
Not in this perfect little universe.
But then most people don't expect such felons and perverts in their own families - and that's where this whole crap happens mostly.
Okay, not in my case.
I lived in London - Belgravia - with my parents when I was five or six years old.

Yes, you got that right, I lived in England. My father served as a Marine Corps pilot, and moved bases during much of my childhood. This earned me my affinity for languages, I think, and my interest for archeology and treasure-hunting.
But I run off the topic.
Well...do I want to write about this?
I'm not quite sure. Maybe I just want to run off the topic.
But I always finish what I started, so why not now?

Okay. Well, we lived in London.
I was about five or six years old as I already told you. And believe me or not, my mother told me I was a really sweet child although I already had the tendency to alienate people.
Our neighbor was a certain Adrian Mole, in his early thirties, really nice as it seemed, educated, wearing said expensive suits and shiny shoes, friendly and helpful. He had a bunch of interesting books and stories to tell as he travelled the whole world being a photographer and author. Perfect for a nosy little boy eager for knowledge.
My parents were quite thankful that I was able to spend so many afternoons in the man's sitting-room when they did not have the time to care for me.
Mr. Mole was from Australia, blonde, blue-green eyed and could have been Chase's twin brother. And I always liked to be with him until one day around Christmas.
My parents were busy preparing the holidays, buying gifts and so on and asked Mr. Mole if he could take care of me for a few hours.
Of course he could.
And he did.
After that very afternoon I was scared to death when I saw him and screamed my soul out when he came near me. My parents were unable to make head or tail of my behavior, Mr. Mole kept up his sugary smile and I didn't say a word.
I soon chose to forget about what he did to me, that he made me do things I hated, hit me with his belt and hurt me, and we moved to India a few weeks later.

I buried all that somewhere in the back of my head and that's where Chase dug it out that evening at Hemingway's when he was totally drunk and told me about the things he wanted to do with me. (Yes, I know he didn't mean business, but he dug it out nevertheless.) Things that would have rung in an interesting evening if it would have been James who uttered them.
But it was Chase who did.
Chase from Australia.
Chase with his accent.
Chase with his blonde hair.
Chase with his blue-green eyes.
Chase who could have been Mole's twin.
Chase who followed me up the stairs, grabbed my cane and told me I wasn't to escape him that easily.
And that's what made it. I felt the same fear, disgust, anger and helplessness like so many years ago.

I didn't really remember what happened at Belgravia but from that evening on I have to admit I was scared of Chase and unable to behave normally when he was near me.
He was used to having a hard time, but that was different and I really should apologize to him some day.

It was Friday, I think...yes, it was Friday. Cuddy compelled me to clinic duty and it was around 3 pm.
An old man who broke his arm was waiting in exam room 5. I didn't really look at him and examined his arm when he spoke to me.
"Gregory House..that name sounds familiar."
An Australian accent. Maybe a relative of Chase?
"Does it?", I mumbled disinterested and began to treat his arm.
"Yes", the man insisted. "Did you live in London as a child?"
I froze and looked up into blue-green eyes. This could have been Chase as an old man and I felt a shiver run down my spine. I felt paralyzed and couldn't tell why for some seconds.
He slowly nodded. "It's you. I recognize your eyes."
He then pointed at my cane. "What a pity I'm not a bit younger. It wouldn't be easy for you to escape me."
Now I knew.
Everything was there again - before my inner eye.
The memories rushed over me like a tsunami, I stumbled to my feet, limped out of the room as fast as I could and fled from clinic.

I nearly ran into James on my way out and just came to a stop when I heard his "HEY!" and he grabbed my arm.
I blinked and recognized him. "Oh...James. I..I didn't see you."
He raised an eyebrow. "What am I? Some kind of ghost?"
Foreman was at his side and looked at me with a puzzled expression. I must have been an odd sight.
I didn't reply and just said "Let's get outta here!" and hobbled on making my way to my office. Jim and Foreman followed me.
"So you are ready?"
I nodded disregarding th fact I still had one hour of clinic duty left. "Outta here!", I repeated and took my coat and my bag.
"Are you on the lam?!", Jim asked and raised his hands.
I didn't reply to that, too, and headed for the car park. "Get your things and let's leave here!"
Foreman and Jim shrugged, got their things (Foreman was invited to spend the evening with us as he was alone this Friday night - Chase was out with Dr. Marks) and followed me.
I was monosyllabic and must have behaved fairly odd. I was asked several times what was up and why I was shivering. James even thought I was on detox...

Hours later I told them. And they could guess what Mole did to me when I was a child 'cause I said I whished to shove my cracked and splinted cane deep into his ass "to make him feel what he did to me".
James was shivering with anger, fury and disbelief and suddenly said "Well...why not?"
Foreman nodded eagerly. "Yes! Why not?!"
I gawked at them. They'd accompany me when I wished to do such things?
They would!
Believe me - it was weird, odd and...unbelievable. We prepared with black clothes and I decided to use a broken ice wine bottle instead of my broken cane.
Well...and we spotted some very interesting things in Foreman's trunk...
We really made our way to the place Mole spent his holidays here and I began to feel undecicive.
I was so close to payback but suddenly knew I couldn't do that. I didn't want to get Jim and Foreman into trouble and I was sure I really couldn't do that.
Yes, he did horrible things to me.
Yes, he hurt me and yes, he spoilt me somehow.
But I wouldn't be an inch better if I now shoved a broken bottle into his ass and he died.
Both of them were relieved when I told them and I still don't know how to ever thank them for accompanying me.
And now I met him again, remembered the whole crap...I somehow feel better.
And I'm not scared of Chase anymore.

Sorry, Chase.
And sorry, Jim and Foreman for this weird and spoilt evening.

Pranks...silly pranks

Mood: Hee Hee!
Weather: oh so cold
Drinking: coffee again
Listening to: An emotional time - Hothouse Flowers

I think we'll need a new sofa.
I know - we just had to buy a new bed, but I have the strange feeling our couch is ruined.
Hm, and maybe Ed's couch at his office is ruined, too by now.
I really don't know but it could be.

Well...my mind needs distraction and things to think of when there are no interesting cases. The last patient was a boring Zollinger-Ellison guy, so no puzzles for me today so far.
Hoyt is still searching for the case that seems to have disappeared from his file due to some strange and mysterious reasons. He's hopping mad by now 'cause he fears his job is at risk now.
Should I tell him I spotted this special part of his file in Dr. Marks' office? Underneath a flower pot?
Hm...I have not the slightest clue how it got there.
But Woodrow (he hates being called Woodrow, hehe) threatened to commit suicide if he looses his job and haunt my office afterwards if this should be my fault. I don't know if I want such a nag to haunt my office but hey, I could have my very own Nearly Headless Nick then.
But no...I should really tell him that it was Marks who snatched the case.
Honesty is the best policy, eh?

Well....and Dr. Marks started to work at our OBGYN yesterday - I already told you, right?
He has his own office there and I prepared a nice welcome sign reading Welcome to my dictatorship! and awaited him in his chair.
I was so thoughtful to even offer him a welcome drink - some damn good red wine from Australia. Of course I didn't tell him his glass was refined with sleeping pills.
Shortly after I left his office he passed out on his sofa - I saw it through the windows.
Oh...and I hope he woke up again before his body discovered there was castor oil, too, in his wine...
Welcome to the PPTH, Dr. Marks!

James left early this morning and didn't bother to raise me from sleep, so I got here by bike and didn't speak to him yet as he seems to avoid me. Could it be he's pissed off?
I really wonder why...It wasn't me who ruined our couch. Well...he was reading some oncologists's magazines until late and fell asleep on the sofa. I went to bed somewhen around midnight and woke up again around 3 am just to notice he still wasn't in bed.
I tiptoed into the living room and found him sleeping there wearing his McGill t-shirt and a wornout jeans. He looked so cute and sweet that I felt my heart stinging again. I pondered to awake him with a kiss and ask him to come to bed but then the little devil inside of me decided to do something else.
I filled a bowl with lukewarm water, put it on the floor alongside the sofa and carefully placed his hand into it.
Then I sneaked into the bedroom again and soon fell asleep.

In the early morning hours I awoke by a cry and loud cussing.
"FUCK! You idiot!!!"
Rummaging.
"Bastard!!!"
Tapping.
Rummaging.
Slamming of the bathroom door.
"DAMN!"
Rubbing sounds on the couch.
"Fuck it fuck it FUCK IT!!!"
The sound of a fist slamming onto the couch table.

I pretended to be sound asleep although I heard Jim coming into the bedroom.
"Be prepared, sleeping beauty!", I heard him gnarl and then there was some rummaging again and he left the room.
I tried hard not to giggle and managed to fall asleep again.
When I woke up he wasn't in bed. I stretched, arose and found he was already gone.
I'll climb on his balcony now and see if I can catch him there.
Maybe I should invite him to a really nice lunch now.

A deep-frozen car and an annoying detective

Mood: still annoyed
Weather: cold and snowy
Drinking: black coffee with sugar
Eating: the chocolate covered marshmallows I snatched from said detective
Listening to: I'm not the man - 10,000 Maniacs

This morning was cold.
Frigging cold.
Incredibly cold!

After I slighlty woke up in the middle of the night 'cause James cuddled me madly and covered my face with kisses I just dozed off into a light slumber and woke up early. It was somewhere around 6am and I arose, had a shower and percolated coffee.
Rummaging through the cupboards and the fridge I found what I wanted and prepared French Toast for breakfast.
Just when I wanted to raise James from his sleep he plodded into the kitchen rubbing the sleep from his eyes. "Morn...", he murmured and stretched a bit. He does not know what this sight does with me I think.
"Morning, cuddly wuddly", I grinned at him and set the table. "Coffee's ready and the French Toast in a minute. Sit down and wake up, hun."
James looked at me a bit sleepy and sat down shaking his head. "What happened that you are awake and already prepared breakfast?"
I poured the coffee and shrugged. "Dunno, I just felt like it."
Then I served the French Toast and sat down, too.
James smiled at me. "I had no objections if you felt like it more often."
I sneered at him. "No way turning me into your little wife", I pointed at him.
James chuckled. "Ah...no...I wouldn't want that. I love my sweet grumpy husband too much."
"See?", I answered and blitzed the toast.
James shook his head. "There it is again - my demolition bomb..."
"I'm hungry", I replied still chewing and showed him the chewed remains in my mouth with an "Haaaaargh!"
"Ukk!", James exclaimed and raised his hand. "I don't want to see that!"
"I know", I snickered and sipped my coffee.
I behaved the rest of our breakfast and I cleared up while James showered and dressed.

When we went out the cold air hit us like a hammer. "Geez!", I exclaimed. "I want to curl up in bed again! This is disgusting!"
I rubbed my hands and watched James who tried to open his car. The driver's door was frozen, the passenger door, too.
"See?", I pouted. "The car does not want to leave either. Let's stay at home."
James rolled his eyes. "Lazyass..."
He tried one of the backdoors and finally managed to open the one on the left side.
"Hah!", he exclaimed, threw his bag to the passenger seat and climbed from the backseat to the driver's seat.
I giggled. "You look silly. But I got a nice view of your sweet little ass!"
"Just shut up and come in!", he replied. "It's cold and I want to shut the doors."
"Okay...but don't expect me to climb to the passenger seat", I said and sat down on the backseat of the car.
When I closed the door I put on a snobby expression and pointed ahead with my cane.
"James, to hospital please!"
First he gasped but then just replied "Very well, Sir", and started the engine. So I had my personal chauffeur to PPTH this morning.

Sitting at my desk and flipping through some files I tried to think of something mean and embarassing I could do to Dr. Marks who took up employment at OBGYN today.
My thoughts were interrupted by Foreman who asked me if I could accompany him seeing a patient. I hate such visits but my ducklings always have their reasons when they call me to someone.
The guy promised to become an interesting case and I limped backwards to my office still talking to Foreman who stood at the door to our common room. I saw him gesturing but it was too late. I "ran" into someone who cussed and dropped a file.
"Oooooops!", I said and turned to the man who gathered his papers and glared at me.
"Ooops? Can't you just pay attention?"
I grinned at the grumpy face and shrugged. "Did someone have bad sex last night?"
"My sex life is none of your business!", he snapped and bobbed up. "Go and get yourself some illegal prescriptions and mind your own business!"
I congratulated myself for pissing someone off so quickly.
"Bad sex or no sex for months", I smirked. This must have been the detective from Boston. I heard some rumors about two boys who have been shot down and were his case now. "And I don't think you're here because of illegal subscriptions", I continued eyeing the file in his hands. I was nosy, I have to admit.
"Your luck I am not!", he gnarled and put the file into his jacket. Too bad. Now I wasn't able to spot anything.
"I could do with a coffee now. How about you?", I asked with my brightest smile. He shrugged and took the bait. "Yeah...why not..." He seemed to think I wanted to apologize but I just wanted to catch a glimpse of his file.
"This way", I grinned and headed for the cafeteria. Foreman watched us passing by and shook his head at me.
When I sat down I said "Black coffee with sugar, please. Your treat."
The man grunted, rolled his eyes and went to the counter. When he came back he put a mug in front of me and slammed a tray to the table. Two Reubens!
I was surprised. "How did you know?"
He shrugged and unwrapped his sandwich. "Every doctor I know is crazy for Reubens. You're Dr. House, right?"
"Er...yes...", I replied and fought to unwrap my sandwhich.
"Thought so", he said. "Read the name on the door to your office. I'm Detective Woody Hoyt."
Food seemed to lift up his bad mood. I didn't answer, forgot to say 'Thank you' and took a bite from my Reuben. "UKK!", I exclaimed and dropped it to the table. "It has pickles!" I looked at it as if it was crap on toast. Shivering with disgust I removed them and offered them to Hoyt. "Want some? But not this one, I chewed on it."
He took a deep breath. "You do not bother to thank me, let me pay for your coffee and your damn Reuben and just complain about pickles?! I'm not in the mood for such crap now! Didn't sleep for more than 30 hours and have to wait for a victim to wake up!"
Now that my Reuben wasn't contaminated anymore I took a hearty bite, leaned back and munched happily. Subway has better Reubens but this one was for free - never look a gift horse in the mouth.
"Are you always grumpy like that?", I then asked. "I'm not in need of competition! You need your victim to wake up? A little adrenaline could help that", I smirked.
"Don't you dare!", he spat. "I'm not grumpy, I just want to go home!"
"Sooo bitchy!", I answered and rolled my eyes towards the ceiling. "I was just trying to help you. Believe me or not, I have my nice moments. Now it's over, I'm sorry."
I leaned back in my chair again. "Thank you by the way! What exciting things are waiting for you at home? A puppy dog? An empty appartment? You look as if you'd nearly fall asleep on that chair."
He finished his sandwhich and smashed the tray to the table angrily. "A bed! That's waht's waiting for me!"
I saved my sandwhich from being crushed by the tray and just shook my head. "A bed...really exciting", I mumbled and took another bite.
I was curious about the victim but knew Detective Hoyt would not tell me anything at all. But there was that file...
"What if I offer you the couch at my office? It's quite comfortable. You could have a nap and stop being grouchy."
"I'm no moron!", Hoyt grunted and glared at me again. "As soon as I'm asleep you'll snatch my file, I see how nosy you are."
Rats! He got me.
"This really hurts, you know that? As if I snatched files! Put it in your pants if you want when you lay down!", I pouted and tried to hide my disappointment.
I so would snatch it even out of his pants.
Hoyt snorted. "Of course. I'm sure someone would grab into my pants then!"
I shot him an indignant look. "You really think I'd let my hand slip in your pants? No way!"
In fact I had thought of asking Foreman to do so and I was damn sure that Foreman was capable of snatching the file without Hoyt noticing it.
"If you would I'd shove your cane in your ass!", he snapped and I grinned.
"I'd rather have other things shoved in my ass than my cane", I chuckled and thought of last night.
Hoyt just shook his head and stomped out of the cafetaria.
Shoot! The file was gone with him.

I walked back to my office and found a part of his file that slipped beneath my door when he dropped it. With a broad grin I noticed it was the case. After I read it I hid it under my fern and went to James whisteling a tune...

Point Pleasant lives up to its name

Really.
It was pleasant.
Such a pity Jim got sick again.
I am so sorry for him.
But Saturday evening was a real pleasure.

Jim already told you we've been at the Chinese reataurant on the main street, right?
Geez, I could still laugh my ass off when I think of the bottle there. I wish I could show it here - it really looked like a pecker.
Foreman was not that amused to receive a picture of it on his cell and wrote a text asking us if we already had one over the eight. I couldn't stop giggling when Jim wrote back We heard a rumor. Are you really gay?
Foreman must have been surprised or he thought I grabbed Jim's cell to write this text. We exchanged some more silly text messages and payed our meals finishing with another plum wine.

When we stepped outside Jim suddenly flung his arms around me and shoved me to the wall. He looked deep into my eyes and his countenance was totally earnest.
"Thank you", he said.
I gazed into his dark brown eyes with growing fascination and discovered the golden spots in them again. "Thank you for what?", I asked slightly puzzled.
He bent forward and placed a sweet little kiss on my lips. "For being with me. For spending your life with me."
I swallowed. "Thank you, the same to you!"
I embraced him and for some minutes we just stood there and I rested my chin on his shoulder. It felt so good I cannot describe it. So I just snuggled to him and sighed.
When he pulled back from me he ran his fingers through my hair.
"I never wanted anything else since I met you..."
I had to swallow hard again. "You're adorable. I love you."
He kissed me and I leaned back to the wall. My heart was slopping over again and I had that fluffy, dizzy and love dazed feeling which made me walk like on wobbly soft clouds.
The door opened and a whole gang passed us by but we didn't care.

Some ages later we looked into each other's eyes again, grinned and walked on.
"God, Greg, you're cute!", Jim sighed and took my hand. I didn't feel cute at all but just squeezed his hand and looked at the pub on the other side of the street.
"Ah....you smelled Guinness, hm?", James grinned and I shrugged.
"Not really....but...it sounds alluring, doesn't it? We have no Guinness at home and a pint or two here would be a nice finish for the evening out." I waggled my eyebrows and Jim shook his head.
"Cider for me then", he smiled broadly. "Sounds really more than alluring."

The pub was crowded but we found a small table next to the fireplace and sat down there. I leaned back in my chair and watched James. The fire drew patterns of light on his face and hair and I felt a traction somewhere in my heart. He beamed at me and his eyes sparkled. "'sup?", he asked and I was all smiles.
"I just can't believe you're my husband from time to time. That you are with me...", I sighed. "Geez! I feel swept from my feet when I look at you."
James blinked and beamed with joy. "That's what I think when I look at you. God, Greg...why don't you show this side to anyone besides me?"
I looked at my hands. "I don't want to. No need to know me inside out. We've been through so much crap and you've always been at my side. You never left, you never hurt me...Of course we had our brawls but...who doesn't?"
I looked up again. "I love you. So you should know me like no one else, right?"
He swallowed and nodded. "Right..."
I tried to draw off the attention and opened the menue.
"So it's Cider for you, hun? Sure? You can order Orgasms here..."
"What?!"
I nodded and showed it to him. "See? Guinness with Champagne. Sounds awful."
"Um...no...just Cider, please", he smiled. "I'll order the orgasm later..."
I chuckled. "Okay...I'll see what I can do for you, Dr. Wilson."
We ordered our pints and I leaned back in my chair again turning the Guinness in my hands. "This is perfect", I sighed. "You are here with me, we sit by the fire, we're off from work, we have Guinness and Cider and it's stormy outside which makes it even cosier." As if on cue Perfect Day by Lou Reed began to play and I closed my eyes with another contented sigh.
"You are cute", Jim whispered and bent over the table to caress my cheek.
So we sat there, just smiling at each other, listening to the music, the babbling around us, the wind outside and from time to time the cracking of the fireplace. It was perfect.

On my way to the men's restroom I discovered the pub's billiard saloon. No one was in there and when I came back I asked Jim "What about snooker, hun? There's a billiard saloon over there."
Jim stretched lazily and I just stared at him. "Snooker? Why not..."
He grabbed his glass, handed my Guinness to me and we made our way to the billiard saloon. Thelight was dim, the room was still empty and James put his glass on one of the tables, looked around and stretched again.
I don't know if he did this on purpose, but it had the same effect on me as always. So I closed and locked the door and limped over to him. Embracing him from behind I purred into his ear. "My cue is already prepared...."
Jim shivered and turned to me. "God Jehovah, Greg! I...well....I have no doubt...it was easily to...erm...get to know that..."
I grinned, bent forward to kiss him deeply and began to unbutton his shirt. Shoving him to one of the billiard tables I continued to do so and he was too shocked or absorbed in our kiss to protest. I reassured myself that the room had no windows and then raised James with a jolt on the table. "Heave-ho!", I chuckled and crawled up to him pushing him down and continuing to undress him.
With slightly dilated eyes James looked at me and panted "Did you lock the door?"
I nodded and bent down to kiss him.
Ooooooh boy...we had a very pleasant game of snooker in that pub.

After we rearranged our clothes we went back to our places as if nothing ever happened, chuckled at each other and ordered a last pint. I decided to try a Snakebite which was really good.
When we left the pub we decided to have a nightstroll along the beach and I wrapped deep into my coat 'cause it was frigging cold. James took my hand and put it into his coat pocket and we watched and listened to the sea for a while. It was 3 am by now and apart from us no soul was on the beach. The moon glistened on the waves and James took me into his arms. "Some moments should last forever", he said and kissed me deeply. "You'd better stop this", I murmured into the kiss and wrapped my arms around him.
"Why should I?", he whispered back and let his hand slip into my trousers.
"Gawd!", I gasped and pulled him even closer. He continued what he began and my legs turned to jelly and reason was washed away.
"Pleeeeeeeeeeze", I whispered and now it was me who watched him with dilated eyes.
"Greg...", he said. "We're on the beach, it's cold and it's 3am..."
"Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeze...."
"Greg...."
"Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeze....."
One second later I found myself laying in the sand behind "Jim's log" and didn't feel cold at all.

Me and my red mug

Yes....Chase is running around with his camera again.



I show it here because James likes my jumper...

Crappy tests

Your Inner European is Irish!

Sprited and boisterous! You drink everyone under the table.

Who's Your Inner European?

You Are 40% Gentleman

You tend to think that etiquette is crap, and you pretty much act however you please. And while this does please you, it pretty much offends everyone else.

Are You A Gentleman?

You Belong in Fall

Intelligent, introspective, and quite expressive at times... You appreciate the changes in color, climate, and mood that fall brings Whether you're carving wacky pumpkins or taking long drives, autumn is a favorite time of year for you

What Season Are You?

You Belong in Dublin

Friendly and down to earth, you want to enjoy Europe without snobbery or pretensions. You're the perfect person to go wild on a pub crawl... or enjoy a quiet bike ride through the old part of town.

What European City Do You Belong In?

Your Seduction Style: The Charmer

You're a master at intimate conversation and verbal enticement. You seduce with words, by getting people to open up to you. By establishing this deep connection quickly, people feel under your power. And then you've got them exactly where you want them!

What Is Your Seduction Style?

I love it

TGIF

Mood: ready for weekend
Weather: light snow, 30 °F
Drinking: coffee
Listening to: In the Dutch mountains - The Nits

What does TGIF mean?
Are you kidding?
Thank God It's Friday of course!
And you don't know the song I'm listening to? No big wonder, it's a Dutch band I suppose.:

I planned to sneak out early today but a consultation put a spoke in my wheel. Dr. Jordan from Boston asked me to see a patient and the case seemed to be quite interesting. First they thought he'd suffer from myalgic encephalomyelitis (better known as chronic fatigue syndrome I suppose) because he experiences profound, overwhelming exhaustion, both mental and physical, which is worsened by exertion, and is not relieved by rest. They tried everything on him, ANS stimulants and so on but he responds to nothing. CFS is difficult to treat and the causes may vary, I know, but they are sure that it must be something else.
And as James has a patient in the late afternoon I decided to 'take on business' and help Dr. Jordan together with my ducklings.

The morning was filled to the brim with boring clinic duty so I was really looking forward to a new puzzle and after a very pleasant lunchbreak I had a cup of coffee at my office when Dr. Jordan arrived.
A tall man in his thirties, nattily dressed, blackhaired and very self complacent at first glance. Besides that he looked somehow familiar and soon I would find out why.
I ignored the hand he offered and just nodded a hello to him while he examined me closely. Suddenly a broad grin appeared on his face and he laughed.
"Whoooohoooo! It's Greggo! Hey, where's your groupie?"
I raised an eyebrow and grinned. "So I know you from Baltimore, hm?"
He nodded and dropped into the visitors' chair. "Yes, and your speech was amazing. Do you still have that pink rabbit?" Again the corners of his mouth twitched and he laughed.
I snorted. "Yes, I still have it. Well, and my groupie is the Head of Oncology, you could visit him and ask for his rattle."
Jordan rubbed his chin and seemed to think about it. "Hmmm...I think I'll ask him for some tips. A friend of mine has to give a speech on Tuesday and I'd love to cheer there."
I shrugged. "Maybe he'll lend you the horn, who knows..."
Jordan snickered. "After all I heard about you I wonder why he's still alive..."
I leaned back in my chair and said "Come in", when Foreman and Cameron knocked at the office door. "After all you heard about me? Oh, I love my reputation!", I answered and aquainted everyone.
Cameron beamed at Dr. Jordan and Foreman and me winked at each other. Maybe that guy would lift her mood slightly. She was so bitchy of time it was hard to bear.
With her most beautiful smile she shook his hand and afterwards announced that she percolated coffee and everything was ready at our conference room.

So we all arose and sat down at our conference table again.
Well, the others sat down, I stood with my mug at the whiteboard and was ready to scribble down any information Jordan could give.
"Exhaustion, depression, muscle weakness, cardiac problems", I wrote down.
Suddenly the door opened and Chase came in to join us which caused Foreman to beam and Cameron to frown. I just grinned.
"So the wombat is fine again?"
Chase rolled his eyes and introduced himself to Dr. Jordan. "I'm not Dr. Wombat but Dr. Chase!" Then he turned to me and grimaced. "So nice to be here again. I really missed the pet names you give me."
I bowed and smirked. "I know you can't live without that! Fancy some munchies?", I asked and offered him a pencil.
Chase just raised his hands and dropped into the chair next to Foreman.
"Okay", I then began. "What do we have here? It's definitely not myalgic encephalomyelitis - they already tested this by diagnosis of exclusion."
"Myasthenia gravis?", Chase asked and I shook my head simultanously with Dr. Jordan.
"No...that would just explain the muscle weakness, not the other symptoms."
I flipped throught the patient's file and scribbled down some more symptoms.
"Low blood pressure that falls further when standing, depression, loss of appetite, craving for salt and salty foods..." Here I stopped.
"By the way...can anyone get me a bag of roast chicken flavor crisps?"
Three voices said "NO!", I sighed and continued.
"Restlessness and diaphoresis...ukk!"
"Could be hypotension", Foreman tried his luck.
"And the salty food?", I asked.
"And the diaphoresis?", Jordan asked.
Foreman sighed and shrugged. "Right..."
I turned to Dr. Jordan. "Was he tested for hyperkalemia?"
He shook his head. "Not yet."
"Hyponatremia?"
"Um...no."
"Okay...we should do that first and then meet here again", I proposed which meant I would study the file again and the others did the testing.

The tests showed that his the sodium level in the plasma was below 135 mmol/L - therefor the sweating and nausea - and an elevated blood level (above 5.0 mmol/L) of the electrolyte potassium.
"Okay...now we get closer...", I said and rubbed my chin.
Without knocking Jim came in. "Greg, I wanted to...oh...I'm sorry", he blushed.
He thought I was still alone in here 'cause I told him so when the others were away doing the tests.
"No need to be sorry - they just came back a few minutes ago", I smiled at him and noticed my legs turn to jelly when he smiled back.
Jordan grinned like a Cheshire cat. "It's Greggo's groupie!", he chuckled and arose to greet James which made him blush again.
"Um...Dr. James Wilson. So you heard his speech..."
Jordan nodded. "Yes, I did. I wanted to ask you for a rattle 'cause a friend of mine gives a speech on Monday", he winked.
James grinned. "Oh...I might need it this weekend, I'm sorry."
"You might, hm?", I asked and offered him a coffee.
"So, my groupie, sit down here next to me if you'd fancy a coffee. We're solving a puzzle right now."
He 'accidentally' brushed my arm with his as he walked by and sat down. "With pleasure, my admired superstar."
Jordan shook his head and grinned. Looking from James to me and back he raised an eyebrow and gave us a questioning glance. "You know each other for long now, don't you?"
James leaned back in his chair and nodded. "More than 10 years."
"So that's settled now?", I asked and tapped the marker against the whiteboard. "We still have Mister Drowning-in-sweat here. And his number of eosinophils is increased."
James sipped his coffee and I felt the urge to hug him but held myself back. "Hodgkin's lymphoma?", he asked.
"That would explain sweat, weight loss and fatigue at least", I sighed. "But not the other symptoms", I gestured to the whiteboard with the marker again. "And his lymph knodes are normal."
He smiled at me. "I see that the gearwheels in your head are already turning and I bet you know what it is."
"I think so...." I turned to Dr. Jordan. "Does your patient like milk?"
"Huh? Um...I think so..."
"Let's visit him and let him drink some milk."
They all looked at me as if I was going mad (except James) and our caravan made its way to the patient.
The poor guy seemed to be scared of me but I'm used to this. He had his glass of milk and suddenly his hand began to flex once a second. "See?", I grinned and turned to the patient. "Never mind...this tetany is caused by phosphate excess... Do you feel numbness in your extremities?"
He did and he showed tremor every now and then. The most evident symptom was the melasma suprarenale - reddish darkened skin at his arms.
"I think I can help you, Dr. Jordan", I said and turned around without saying goodbye to the patient. The others left more politely and a few minutes later we were at the conference room again.
"You know what it is?", Jordan asked me.
I nodded and swayed my empty mug underneath Jim's nose to incite him to pour coffee in it. "Menace", he sighed and took the mug.
I kissed his nosetip when he handed me the mug again and ignored Dr. Jordan's puzzled look. "Addison's disease", I answered. "What about an assay for 21-hydroxylase antibodies?"

It turned out to be Addison's disease and he left highly pleased and thankful but without rattle.
I am waiting for Jim now and when he's finished with his patient we'll go home, have a shower, change clothes and then have dinner at Ganges, 33 Princeton-Hightstown Road. We both are in the mood for Indian food today and want to introduce a very pleasant evening with this dinner. I think I'll have Chicken Hyderabadi.

Geez!

Cuddy's brooch was awful today!!!

Reading the contract

It's really our's!
Whooooosh!

If you'd like to listen to the song

....I sang to James:



Of course I sound different!

I tried to be an artist

...and miserably failed...

Here I stand and face the rain
High up on the mountain
Looking down I am again
Spreading my arms out wide
Letting me fall down
Letting me glide
Feeling the wind on my face

I feel no fear
Though free I am falling
I just trust
And hear you calling
Spreading your arms out wide
You wait for me
As I fall down and glide

Nothing can harm me
You're by my side
I don't run anymore
There's no need to hide.

The Nobodies

I told Jim about that song 'cause it's great.
He didn't know it and called me the music nerd again.
So, luv, here it is.
The video is a bit disturbing....so maybe, dear readers: Just listen and don't watch.

An evening at the Irish pub

Mood: back at work. Guess my mood...
Weather: sunny but damn cold
Drinking: black coffee with sugar - as nearly always
Eating: a sandwich with cheese, carrots and ramson
Listening to: Don't dream it's over - Crowded House

Geez!
He really did it!
He bought the house!
It's our's!!!

It's nice, it's cosy, it has a piano and the bathtub (hehe)! I still can't really believe it. But it's our's. We spent the weekend there.
Saturday we had a more than pleasant afternoon and planned to go to the Irish pub in the evening.
Well, we did. And painted Point Pleasant red, I suppose. Before we went to the pub James bought MacBeth and we grabbed a Caramel Macchiato at Starbucks. Walking resp. limping along the boardwalks we had a good time mocking the passers-by. It's hard to believe how many idiots are out on a Saturday night. And it's hard to believe how many of these idiots stare at you when you're hobbling around with a cane in your hand. Is this really that abnormal?
Maybe I'm just too pettish sometimes but I hate to be stared at.
Foreman - I know what you'll say now. "House, and to avoid that you glare into the world so that no one dares to lay eyes on you." And no, that's not true. My glaring is just my response to their staring.
I never tell Jim when I'm feeling like this and I bet he'll be upset when he reads it. Don't be cross with me now, hun, okay?

The morons around lifted my mood again. Sometimes you just can't believe that some people are real. But they are. Is that sad? Is that funny? I'm not sure.
Well, I was just fretting 'cause my leg hurt really much that evening I think and I didn't want to tell Jim not to spoil his mood. So I clung to my Macchiato and delighted in the thought we now have a house here. This and most of all Jim at my side lifted my mood more than a thousand morons around and I suddenly stopped.
James took a few steps and then stopped, too, and looked at me.
"Hm?"
I crooked my index finger.
He raised an eyebrow. "Huh?"
I crooked it again.
"Greg...just tell me what you want..."
I just grinned and crooked my index finger once again.
So he came back the two or three steps to me and I took him into my arms and cuddled him madly.
"Greg!", he exclaimed and laughed cuddling me back.
"I love you", I told him and kissed him deeply in the middle of the boardwalk. This silenced every possible objection and to my suprise he returned the kiss. I'm not sure if he'd do that at Plainsboro, but at Point Plesant he did.
"Ah, no! It's them again!", we heard someone exclaim and it was the couple we met so often. We both chuckled and grinned at them walking on as if nothing ever happened.

After discarding our beakers Jim really took my hand and we headed for the pub. I can tell you - I was beaming with happiness and pride. He slightly squeezed my hand when we entered the pub and looked for a table. It was already fairly crowded but we found a nice table for two next to the small stage and cornered by two other tables. First I was grumpy because of having the back of the man behind me touching my back but then shrugged and chose to forget this. He did not nudge me or bother me in any other way, so I was fine. And I'm sure this was a small surprise to Jim.
We ordered a bacon and cheese burger (and mine had no pickles!) accompanied by a pint of Guinness. Aaaah, when they brought the pints I was at peace with the world and myself and just looked around and listened to the music. I didn't notice I was humming along the tunes they played until I felt Jim's gaze on my face.
"Hm?", I asked and raised an eyebrow.
Jim just smiled, shook his head and sipped his Guinness.
I forgot to ask him again because our burgers were served then and I immediately blitzed mine. Jim watched me again and I looked up.
"Fwhat?"
He grinned broadly. "When it comes to food you sometimes resemble a demolition bomb..."
I champed the bit and put on a hurt expression. "This is not true..."
He nodded. "Yes, it is. When you're in the mood you could empty our fridge."
I grinned. "But I'd always spare the carrots."
"You surely would", he sneered. "And not to forget the consumption of certain beverages", he continued and pointed at my empty glass.
I beamed at him innocently. "I was thirsty."
"Sure", he grinned and ordered two more pints.

I had my second pint in my hands when someone familiar walked by. We both stared at him and then ducked our heads. He passed by without noticing us. Thanks to God. It was a patient we both had - a true chatterbox. If he spotted us he was bound to give us an earbashing so we crouched again when he came back and chuckled at each other.
"Doggone! Why on earth does he have to be here?", I complained.
"It's heaven's spanking for your misdeeds, dear", James replied and winked at me.
I pouted. "It's always me who's being punished, huh?"
Again he winked and leered slightly. "I could recompense you when we're home..."
"Okay!", I said. "Let's go home now!"
But Jim shook his head and nudged me over the table. I stuck out my lower lip and tried my puppy eyes but he covered his eyes with his hands.
"Want to be kissed right here and now? In public? Then continue!", he mumbled.
When he took his hands away I was still sitting there puppyeyed and pouting.
A broad smile appeared on his face, he arose, bent over the table and kissed me in front of all the other guests.
Whooooosh!
And guess what? It seemed as if no one noticed. At least nobody frowned at us. We clinked glasses and beamed at each other. What a nice evening!

Gosh, we had many pints, let me tell you that! When I arose to go downstairs and said "I have to pee", James leered again, said "Mhmmmm, me too" and followed me. Okay...afterwards everyone knew our names...
Some Irish guests even asked us to go to another bar with them but we prefered to stay there. The music was much too good, that guy had a brilliant voice and we really had fun there.
Somewhere down the road I took James' hand and sang My love is like a red, red rose to him which nearly brought him to tears. That was not what I intended, I just felt the urge to sing it to him.
Here are the lyrics:

My love is like a red, red rose
That’s newly sprung in June :
My love is like the melody
That’s sweetly played in tune.

As fair art thou, my bonnie lass,
So deep in love am I :
And I will love thee still, my dear,
Till a’ the seas gang dry.

Till a’ the seas gang dry, my dear,
And the rocks melt wi’ the sun :
And I will love thee still, my dear,
While the sands o’ life shall run.

And fare thee weel, my only love,
And fare thee weel a while !
And I will come again, my love,
Thou’ it were ten thousand mile.

Robert Burns

It's such a beautiful poem and I love the melody.
And believe it or not - we were drunk enough to comply the request to sing on stage. We got guitars (yes, they even had one for southpaws) and sang She moves her own way. Good Lord! I hope no one who knows us was there....

A new case - and caught in the act II

Mood: ready for lunch
Drinking: coffee again
Listening to: Via con me - Paolo Conte

In fact, this now should just be called Caught in the act as I already told you about the new case yesterday.
Well, what happened after visiting Starbucks can be read at Jim's blog and he told you he was called to the hospital again. Such a pity, I was in an extremely cuddly mood and didn't want him to leave at all. "I'll be back soon", he said but we doctors can never specify what being back soon really means in the end.
So I lazily dozed in bed for a while, then had a shower and emptied a small bag of roast chicken flavor crisps.

Two hours later I decided to go back to PPTH, too. Not in order to study files, of course, but to pick James up if he was ready. When I made my way to his office everybody looked at me in surprise. I'm sure they all thought "Geez! It's late and Dr. House is still here?" No one noticed we disappeared for a while - we really chose the perfect day for it.
As always I entered without knocking and James looked up from his paperwork. Recognizing who came in he beamed at me."Greg, darling, what are you doing here? Did they call you, too?"
I smiled and sat down at his counselling couch outstretching my legs. "Nope", I said and yawned. "I just wanted to see if you're finished here and pick you up."
James arose from his chair and poured a cup of coffee. "Aw, that's sweet of you, dear", he said and approached me. "You really deserve this coffee now."
I patted the place next to me. "Will you join me or are you too busy now?"
James waved that aside. "Nah...this can wait until tomorrow." I took his hand and he sat down beside me putting his arm around my shoulder.
"You're cute with your mug..."
I raised an eyebrow. "No?"
"Yes."
I sipped my coffee and wondered what was so cute sitting on the sofa with a mug in my hands but Jim sometimes doesn't realize why I think he's cute, too.
James leaned back and his hand on my shoulder caressed me slightly. I sighed and put the mug on the table. There it was, that cuddly mood again. I turned to him and kissed his temple snuggling to him and he made me lay back.
"Mmmmrrrrrrmmmmmm", I purred and held him close hugging him like an idiot which caused him to smile.
"You'd better stop this", he whispered and kissed my nosetip with sparkles in his eyes.
"Better stop what?", I asked.
"That mmmmrrrrrmmmm-sound", Jim replied and muffled any further questions with his kiss which only made me go "Hrrrrrrrrrmmmmmmmmm" again. Sometimes I have the impression we can't sit next to each other and just talk...And I like it that way.
I moaned silently and as our lips parted I could do nothing but stare into his eyes and say "Pleeeeeeeze." And he knows what I want when I say that.

His facial expression was a mixture of joy and hesitating. "Greg...", he softly spoke to me, "we are at my office...on my counselling couch..."
I swallowed. "Ah, Jim, hun, don't stick at trifles! Imagine a Do not disturb-sign on your door. No one even knows we're here..."
I put one hand in his neck and wanted to pull him down to me again, but he still resisted. "Hun...", I moaned, raised my head and tried to find his mouth but he raised his head slightly, too. This was torture, I was sure.
"Pleeeeeeze", I begged again and gazed into his eyes. The corners of his mouth twitched slightly and I could tell his arousal from his eyes. One of his hand began to unbutton my shirt and it seemed as if he wasn't quite aware of that fact.
"Don't look at me this way", he said hoarsely but I could not change the way I looked now. So I just whispered his name follwed by another "Pleeeeeeze" and let my hands slip underneath his jumper.
Jim bent down and kissed my neck while I removed his jumper. "Menace", he whispered and let my shirt fall to the ground. I arched my back as he kissed my chest and soon we were completely undressed on his couch.
None of us thought of locking the door but who would come in anyway if their knock isn't answered?
He was on his way to really take me to heaven when we heared a gasp and our names yelled out.
Geez!
It was horrible!
James looked up, I turned my head and with shock and disbelief we stared at Cuddy who looked down at us. Thankfully Jim covered us with a blanket after we got undressed but we must have been a sight for the gods, a really arresting picture.
"C...Cuddy....", Jim stammered at our still staring boss.
There was no way to explain this and no way of denying what had happened here. I wondered for how long she might have watched us until she yelled out our names.
"You...GOD! This is a HOSPITAL!", Cuddy cried out and I startled underneath Jim. I couldn't help it and began to giggle.
"This is not funny, House!", Cuddy barked which made me even giggle more.
"You should not enter offices when no one answers to your knock", I chuckled.
She rolled her eyes, raised her hands and slammed a file on Jim's desk.
Still shaking her head she hissed "I can't believe it!" and rushed out of the office.
That was when I burst out with laughter.

A new case - and caught in the act

Mood:: giggly
Weather: sunny inside of me
Drinking: guess what?
Eating: chocolate covered marshmallows
Listening to: Perfect Day - Lou Reed

Would you believe me if I told you we spent a nice evening with Foreman eating homemade pizza and drinking Black Sheep?
No?
But we did.
Of course he tried his fad on me again: psychoanalysis.
He still wants to know why I am 'afraid' of Chase (I'm not!) and why I hit Allenby with my cane when he tried to ...well...tried what he did on the one hand and was paralyzed with fear by what Chase told me and tried to do after his 5th Mojito. I'm so tired of this.
I thought and thought and he was contented with nothing I could tell him. Finally it crossed my mind we had a neighbor in London (when I was a child) who looked like Chase. He was a nice guy, I think but I was all over sudden scared to death when I saw him, my mother told me. Maybe he had a nasty cur or something that scared me. Children are dumb sometimes.
Now he even tried to talk me into hypnosis. Geez! He really thinks I needed this.
I am not scared of Chase! This is downright ridiculous!
Well...he drove home after we had the pizza and I spent a distinctly nice evening with James having some Black Sheep, having..well....none of your business.

This morning there was already a new patient file waiting for me, the clover was already awake 'cause someone turned the light on at my office and coffee was ready. Cameron and Foreman greeted me and we looked through the file together.
The patient was a young woman with a rash of small, irregular red spots all over the body. She only came here for these daft spots, not because of her severe, unrelenting headache. I can't understand most patients. Maybe it was just because headaches can't be seen and the spots blemished her.
The file gave nothing more away and I told Cameron and Foreman to visit her and ask her about her condition.

Meanwhile I had a small coffebreak with James accompanied by cuddling on his couch. It was just about to become oh so pleasant when there was a knock at the door.
"Aaaw, no!", I sighed. "They are finished with the patient...Let's just pretend to be not in here."
James grinned and shook his head. "I'm sure they heard your 'Aaaaw no' already."
To confirm this we heard Foreman. "House? Wilson? May...erm...may we come in?"
I giggled. "Let's pull our trousers down and say yes!"
James slapped my head and arose. "Dumbbell!"
He rearranged his hair and answered "Yes, of course!"
Foreman peeked in and was followed by a blushing Cameron who could not take her eyes off my rumpled shirt. "We...um...talked to her..."
I nodded. "That's what I expected. I told you so, remember?"
She blushed even deeper and Foreman tried hard to conceal a grin.
"So...kids!", I smirked, "What do we have here?"
"Sudden high fever, drowsiness, severe headache, stiff neck, intolerance to bright light and sounds, twitching, convulsions...", Foreman began.
"I see....meningitis again", I said and James rolled his eyes towards the ceiling.
"Why don't you just let him continue, House?", he said, well knowing I didn't like it anymore when he called me House.
"Because it's obvious, Wilson!", I replied. "Clear as glass!"
He sighed. "Yes...but there might be something else."
"Okay, fine!", I answered and turned to Foreman again. "Chills, nausea, or vomiting?"
Foreman shrugged. "All three."
"Okay", I smiled and turned to James again. "This together with the odd spot indicates meningococcal meningitis, I'd say..."
Jim raised his hands. "I bow to thee, almighty!"
"Bow to me later", I leered and arose. "We'll have some testing to do now."
I kissed him softly and whispered into his ear "May I come in again when this is over?"
James grinned. "Come in, huh? My pleasure!"

So I left with Cameron and Foreman for my office. "Did you already start empiric antibiotics?", I asked.
"Er...we'll do now...we first wanted to tell you", Cameron said and I just nodded.
"OKay...and draw a blood culture. And examinate the CSF with a lumbar puncture...CT or MRI should be performed after the LP."
It turned out to be Neisseria meningitidis which can usually be treated with a 7-day course of IV antibiotics.

Happily (not because of Neisseria meningitidis of course!) I returned to Jim's office. As soon as I opened the door he addressed me not even looking up (it's always me who comes in without knocking) "Hey, hun, grab your coat! I'm in the mood for Starbucks now."
I obeyed and five minutes later we were on our way and I took his hand. Our fingers interlaced and some patients gave us odd sideglances but I didn't give a flying fuck. (Oh...that was vulgar...I'm sorry, folks!)
At Starbucks I ordered two Grande Caramel Macchiato and Jim bought a sandwich. He asked me about my plans for the evening and looked so cute as he held the sandwich in both hands, munching and a strand of hair in his eyes I could not help it. "Having dessert would be nice", I purred, bent forward and kissed him deeply (after checking he swallowed his food).
"Geez! Greg!", he blushed as we parted again. "We're at Starbucks!"
"So what?", I shrugged. "Was there a sign No Snogging or something?"
He shifted uncomfortably. "No...but...."
"But what? You're my husband, I love you and I wanted to kiss you", I said plainly and took a sip of my Macchiato.
Jim nodded. "Right."
He still wasn't used to showing our affection and love in public and that was so cute again.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sorry...have to go now. To be continued!

At work again - drowsy, with a headeache and earaches

Mood: as you can tell from the headline it's excellent!
Weather: clear, 40 °F
Drinking: black coffee with sugar
Eating: Reuben sandwich (after removing the dreadful pickles)
Listening to: Paint it Black - The Rolling Stones

The world just loves me.
Really.
My boss loves me,
my colleagues love me,
my physical condition loves me.

I am still somehow recovering from the anaphylactic shock I had and in addition to that I have an otitis media caused by the common cold. Doesn't that sound great? Foreman signed me off work yesterday evening for the rest of the week and prescribed antibiotics, but Cuddy saw me walking out, grabbed the sick note and tore it to pieces.
"If you are able to limp out of here that quickly I am sure you'll be able to fulfill your duties tomorrow and the rest of the week", she said, turned on her heels and left me speechless. I feel really sick and no one seems to believe me (except of course James. And Foreman!) which is utterly annoying. I don't fake anything and it's just unfair to treat me like this after the anaphylaxis. I mean, an anaphylactic shock is a life-threatening medical emergency, and I am treated like a dull child!
I got epinephrine and I don't know yet if I needed rescue breathing, no one told me about it. Well...James came in when I fainted, so if I needed I hope it was him who did so.
When I awoke I was in a sickbed, James sitting at my side holding my hand. First I had no clue what happened but then I cursed.
"Damn cashews..."
"There you are again, my love", James said and sounded incredibly relieved. He bent down to me and kissed me softly. "Please don't do that again, dear. Never ever."
He sighed and caressed my cheek. I was still feeling shitty but tried to smile.
"Well...if I had known there are cashews in that cookies I would not have eaten them..."
"I know, pancake", Jim smiled and I grinned at the pet name. Leaning back I closed my eyes again. Everything was still blurry and dizzy.
James raised a bottle of water. "You should drink now and then sleep again to recover", he said and I took the bottle. Just then I realized how thirsty I was and emptied the bottle in a few minutes. I dozed off again and James kissed me goodbye to leave for his office.
Later he brought me my laptop as I told you Friday already. You can imagine how upset I was when Chase did not allow me to go home. He was so bitchy and snapped at me the whole time. He wasn't able to address me properly and I just didn't know why he was so pissed off at me. After some minutes of bickering he rushed out of the room with the words "Stop behaving like a sulky child, House!!!"
He had a headache, I thought, but this was no excuse for his behavior. Foreman just leaned on the wall and looked up at the ceiling. After Chase left he told me "James would kill him if he'd let you leave and something happened to you. You know that." I shrugged. "But James could take me home. Damn! He's a doctor! There is no need to keep me here!"
Foreman let out a deep sigh. "House, we'll have to wait for James and just ask him, okay?" He then followed Chase and for a while I was alone and got really angry. I hated this room and I already missed James like hell. All I wanted was to go home and recover there having him around me.
What happened when Chase and Foreman returned can be read in Chase's blog. I'm still not sure what it was. Respiratory arrest maybe? (Respiratory arrest is the cessation of the normal tidal flow of the lungs due to paralysis of the diaphragm, collapse of the lung or any number of respiratory failures.) I was totally useless as I suffered from some late anaphylaxis again - okaaaaay, maybe it was not that bad I had to stay there. I only know that Dr. Marks came in and took care of me whilst Foreman was treating Chase.

My remembrance is a bit distorted and blurred and I only know I was really pissed off when I found out Saturday morning I had to share my room with Chase. I don't know why this upset me so much - maybe due to the medication I got. I really behaved odd that weekend I think and I missed Jim so much I can't couch it in terms. It felt as if one half of me was missing, I felt so damn incomplete and was so longing for him. This even made me namby-pamby from time to time and must have appeared really strange to Foreman and Chase. Worst was that I had no clue where he was and felt totally abandoned. (Now I know he was at Point Pleasant and thought I was at home by then. He couldn't know I was supposed to stay for the weekend because of that crappy otitis media.)
Foreman was a bit odd, too and I think he just missed Chase. Of course he was here with him but it was not the same as having him at home. Besides that Chase was nearly unable to talk.
As far as I remember I had a new anaphylaxis after lunch because no one told me there were cashews in the pasta I had. So it was the same procedure with the epinephrine again and no thought of going home in the evening.

I was devastated and the medication made me all sentimental. Even without such meds I'm a handful but this must have been hell for my fellow doctors. I continued complaining and griping until late at night resp. early morn' and almost drove Foreman insane. He was in no good condition himself and suddenly turned to me. "Why do you feel abandoned, House?"
I blinked and stared at him. "Huh?"
"You keep complaining, so what's really wrong?" He sat down at my bed and waited for an answer.
"I...I...um...I miss Jim", I said. "I feel all alone, shitty and I want to go home. I don't want to be here - I can as well cure at home."
"What do you think how I feel?", Foreman asked and looked at me slightly aggravated. "I'm tired, Chase is severely ill and I have a headache."
"It's always the others!", I exclaimed. "Other people are always more important than me! Other people's feelings are always more important than mine!"
I don't know why I said that. As I told you...must have been the medication.
Foreman just shook his head and arose again. "Yeah...and I didn't listen to you, right?"
He saw the glance I gave Chase and came back to me. "And by the way I think you are still afraid of Chase!"
"Bullshit!", I snapped but maybe he was right. It was a scary thought to spend the night in the same room with him because I still had in mind what he told me that damn fucking evening at Hemingway's.
"Do you like your father, House?", Foreman suddenly asked me and I looked blank for a while.
"Well....I think I now like him but it took him 47 years to tell me he loves me and he's proud of me."
"And before that?"
I shrugged. "I think he just ignored me. I was not important and was always considered a basket case. Nothing I did was ever good enough and I could never meet his high moral standards."
Foreman considered me attentively and nodded. "You hide behind your ego not to be hurt, House."
"I don't hide!", I gnarled but he just nodded again.
"Yes, you do. And you don't want anyone except your husband to see the vulnerable and nice person inside of you."
"Didn't you belong to those who told me my ego had the size of a small planet?!", I asked and rolled my eyes. This was getting too close for me and I did not want to let this go any further.
"You are unquestionably brilliant, but your ego has the size of a pea and you try to inflate it with sarcasm and by playing the untouchable."
Chase and me stared at Foreman and I was unable to say anything. In any other situation I would have yelled at him or even hit his shins with my cane, but not now. I was sick and drowsy and on new meds, so I just bit my tongue.
"But this, House, makes you likeable and I highly respect you", he closed his therapy lesson and grinned at me.
I just foolishly grinned back and then mumbled "But I still miss him..."
"Try to get some sleep", Foreman said and as soon as my head met the cushion I was sound asleep.

Have I told you lately?

Aw, I'm still walking on wobbly clouds.
We had such a wonderful evening and it all started when I tried to sing Van Morrison's Have I told you lately to Jim:

Have I told you lately that I love you
Have I told you theres no one else above you
Fill my heart with gladness
Take away all my sadness
Ease my troubles thats what you do

For the morning sun in all its glory
Greets the day with hope and comfort too
You fill my life with laughter
And somehow you make it better
Ease my troubles thats what you do
Theres a love thats divine
And its yours and its mine like the sun
And at the end of the day
We should give thanks and pray
To the one, to the one

Listen to it here:YouTube Music Videos 60s 70s - Van Morrison - Have I Told You Lately I Love You

From the sickbed

Yes.
Right.
I am writing from bedside.
God, I'm annoyed!
James brought my laptop to my room to prevent me from dying of boredom.
I decided to get out of bed after writing this entry and going back to my office to leave later with James. No way I am staying here for the night.
Never!

The day began abominable with 5 hours of clinic duty waiting for me. Fortunately James brightened these hours with his visit at exam room 3 and later we had coffee and lunch together. He told me he got rid of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named but didn't tell me what happened yet. I'll check his blog later and see if he wrote about it.

After lunch I got back to my office and found a new file on my desk. A young girl of 15 with vaginal bleeding, chest pain, shortness of breath and hemoptysis (i.e. she coughs up blood). I was thinking of cancer - Choriocarcinoma to be precise.
James had a board-meeting, so I could not consult him. I chose to have Foreman make some tests which showed increased quantitative β-hCG levels.
So I phoned Danby, showed him the file and the results and asked him to X-ray her chest.
Unfortunately he was followed by Allenby and gave me an excusing glance. What could I do? He was an oncologist, he worked here and I could not prevent him from joining consultations. And it was him who did the X-ray.
The chest X-ray showed multiple infiltrates of various shapes in both lungs which confirmed my diagnosis.
"You were right, Gregory", he said. "It's Choriocarcinoma."
Danby grinned. "I fear he's almost always right."
He examined the X-ray and I nodded with a smirk. "Not almost. I am always right. Ask Dr. Wilson."
Allenby looked up. "Are you two still...I mean....", he began.
I narrowed my eyes and watched him. There was nothing disturbing in his expression and I guessed he was really just interested. So I nodded.
"Yes. We are. In fact, we are married now."
He went a bit pale and then blushed. "Oh..." After a sigh he tried to smile. "I am happy for you two. Congratulations."
I chose to say nothing and just nodded. Luckily Allenby decided to leave the office and I was left with Danby who watched as he walked down the hallway.
"He seems to be really nice. We get along well."
I shrugged. "Good..."
"You don't have to tell me what happened. I know it must be something severe but I try to get to know him unprejudiced."
"Do so."

A knock at the glass door announced Foreman who came in with a tablet carrying some mugs, coffee and cookies.
"Coffee break!", he grinned and was followed by a slightly flushed Chase.
"That's the best idea you ever had!", I smirked and hobbled over to the table. Foreman got another mug for Danby and we sat there a while talking and having coffee. The way Chase looked I knew perfectly well what must have happened a few minutes ago and tried to hide my grin.
"You two already had a break, huh?", I asked.
Foreman grinned like a Cheshire cat and Chase blushed even deeper what told me more than a hundred words. Danby looked from one to another and grinned, too.
"A pleasant break if I got it right", he smiled.
"Yah", Foreman grinned and offered some chocolate chip cookies.
Exactly what I wanted now!

"Great!", I thought, grabbed the biggest cookie I could find and munched it. It tasted awesome and after my first "Hmmmmmmmm" I began to feel odd.
I had difficulties swallowing and couldn't breath properly anymore. Shaking my head I went to the window and opened it.
When I came back to the table Chase looked at me. "You look flushed, House.."
I blinked, felt my blood pressure getting very low and got hold on the chair.
"I...", I began and shook my head again. "Were there cashews in that cookie?"
Foreman munched and nodded.
"Shoot!", I said. "The only thing I show allergic reactions to."
Danby arose with a slightly concerned expression and Foreman asked me "How's breathing?"
"Difficult", I answered and my neck started itching.
I felt anxiety and tears began to roll down my cheeks. "Uh...", I said, "...how odd...", and tried to breathe calmly.
Nothing more could be said. The last thing before I fainted and hit the floor was James coming in.

British at ♥ ?

Maybe I am.
This is my new favorite song these days.
It's pure ear candy and I can't get it out of my head.
Have fun.
If not: I don't give a shit!

Snotty noses, mumps and gastro-enteritis

Really exciting!
That's clinic duty.
Bores me to death.
And the patients annoy me.
I hate people.
They all lie and most of them try to pretend an illness just to get a few days off.

Sick children with their oh so scared parents were my business to be dealt with and I told every mom and dad that their child was going to die.
Somewhen.
I couldn't tell them when.

There was this 8-year-old sitting in front of me on the table sniffing his snot back when Chase came in to borrow a pencil.
(Maybe he was hungry?)
I saw the boy was going to sneeze and backed out of the way. So the whole bogey hit Chase's labcoat and dangled from his collar.
"Guck!", I said. "This looks almost alive!"
"Shorry", the boy apologized to Chase and I fought down a mean chuckle.
Chase looked down at his collar with a nauseated expression on his face and was speechless.
I pointed at the yellow matter. "Better get out of here. See? It tries to creep down your collar. I don't want such monsters in this treatment room."
Slowly he looked up at me. Without a word he nodded and left the room.
That was my highlight of the day.

The rest was boredom at it's best. Except the fact that teenager who almost slit open my whole arm was here for a late excuse.

America

I love it!

What a day

Mood: bored
Weather: clear, 35°F
Drinking: coffee
Eating: a lolly from pediatrics
Listening to: Mary's Prayer - Danny Wilson

It's clinic duty for me today.
Which means hell.
Which is highly annoying.
Which is boring.
Which I am trying to avoid.
Which...
Ah, let's drop it.

Maybe I'll pretend to be ill.
Or I sneak out and hide at home.
Oooor I lock myself into treatment room 5.
But I'm almost sure Cuddy will find me. She always seems to know when I'm trying to chicken out of something as if she had some kind of House-radar showing every move and thought of me. This is kinda scary I have to admit. She's always on my ass and totally merciless.

Hm...I think I just hide in that room with my PSP and wait for lunch. I'd love to spend my lunchbreak with James having Sushi or some Indian food. Let's see what he's up to.
Did you read Foreman's pissed off because of my mocking entry?
He flew in a rage and I received some text messages on my cell from Chase who wanted to 'thank' me. But hey, I really think Marks has a crush on Chase! So what? Does that mean Chase is cheating on Foreman? No!

Apropos cheating. I got an e-mail from Marks telling me he thinks Fayt is cheating on him. Poor guy. They seemed so happy that evening at Baltimore.
He should ask him right away I'd slate.
And by the way he seems to be planning to apply for a job here at PPTH! I know they offer jobs at Pediatrics and Pathology but that's all. Marks should really ask Cuddy or just send his résumé and references, wait and see.
No chance he'd ever be a member of Diagnostic Medicine or Oncology of course. I don't even know what he's specializing in.

By the way, I added a Post-It to my sidebar. You now can leave me messages there. Silly, weird and perfect.

Shoot, there's Cuddy!
I have to stop now.
I'm hiding under my desk.
Will write again later...

What the heck

..is so interesting about my trefoil that even Cuddy wanted to see it yesterday?
I have to admit I feel a bit messed around.
And I hate being messed around!
Yes!
I am writing this before having my first cup of coffee!

Just being silly

...and torturing some fellow doctors...

Dr. Marks has a crush on Chaaaahaaaaaase!
Mr. Ed has a crush on Chaaaahaaaase!
Lalalalalaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Meeting He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named

Mood: annoyed
Eating: Reuben sandwich
Drinking: orange juice
Listening to: America - Razorlight

I thought I could do it.
I thought I could avoid him.
I was wrong.

It was while discussing a case with James. I wanted a cup of coffee and poured one for me and one for James in the oncologist's kitchen. When I tried to take both mugs and my cane and to open the door he came in.
At first sight I nearly froze to the ground, then just glared at him and wanted to abscond. He just stood at the door and smiled at me with a strange glistening in his eyes.
"Hello, Gregory."
I chose to say nothing at all and wanted to scurry out.
He didn't move an inch and laid his hand on my arm.
"Don't touch me!", I gnarled and his hand dropped down again.
"I missed you", he said and looked perfectly normal all over sudden.
"It would be a lie if I told you I missed you", I grunted. "And now get lost!"
"I'm sorry", he continued. "I don't know why I did all these things. Most of them I even can't remember properly."
"Ask James for forgiveness. And Chase. But I don't think this would be of any use."
He looked out of the window to a point only he seemed to know.
"Gregory...I really missed you. And I really want to apologize."
"Damnation!", I exclaimed. "Get lost! I want nothing else!"
With these words I put one mug down at the table and made my way past him using my cane to shove him away.
This was the moment Danby joined us. He still didn't know what happened between Allenby and us but he summed up the situation and smiled at me.
"Hello, Dr. House!"
"Hi, Dr. Danby", I greeted him back.
He saw the mug in my hand and the other mug on the table. "Is that Dr. Allenby's mug?"
"No", Allenby replied. "I suppose it's for Dr. Wilson..."
I turned to him and raised the mug I held. "In fact this one's for Dr. Wilson. The one on the table is mine."
"Let me help you", Danby smiled, took the mug and followed me to Jim's office where he said hello to him and put the mug on the desk. I nodded a Thank You and he left.

James leaned forward. "You're a bit pale. Is everything okay with you?"
I just nodded and changed the subject. "Now...don't you, too, think it's cancer?"
Carefully watching me he took the file again. "Sure everything's okay?"
"Of course I am!"
"You met him."
This was no question. It was a simple statement.
I shrugged. "So what? He didn't eat me up..."
James arose and stepped behind me to embrace me. His cheek was snuggling to mine and he held me close. "Hun, you don't have to pretend this doesn't affect you. We both know what he did to you."
For a while I just savored his closeness and covered his hand with mine. A deep sigh later I nodded. "It's stupid trying to hide things from you..."
He took my hand and pulled me up from the chair.
"It is..."
He took me into his arms and kissed me in a way that made me forget time and space. I felt dizzy and just thought Whooooooosh. James gave me a provocative look and locked the door.

One hour later I hobbled back into my office walking on air and forced myself to read the file of that baby girl. Well...we couldn't ask her anything and the medical history wasn't very helpful. The parents told us about prolonged weight loss and difficulty when swallowing, that was all. We had to do some tests.
The tests showed muscle weakness and a slowing mental and motor development.
Foreman looked up from the results. "Krabbe disease?"
I nodded. "It seems so...What about MRI?"
He nodded and off he was.
The examination of the retina showed optic atrophy and further testing revealed that the CSF total protein was increased, there were abnormal Globoid cells in biopsy tissue of the nervous system and nerve conduction velocity showed delayed nerve conduction and evidence of demyelination.
It was Krabbe...
There is no specific treatment for Krabbe disease and the only thing we can try is a bone marrow transplantation.

Drudging again

Mood: irritated
Weather: clear, 40 °F
Eating: tangerines
Drinking: coffee of course
Listening to: I write sins not tragedies - Panic! at the Disco

Yeah!
I like that song!
One thing that brightens up that annoying morning.
Wednesdays suck!

Okay...I know I always choose the day we have right now to suck. But this Wednesday really sucks.
It started oh so pleasant somewhen around 5.30 am when James chose to wake me up in his own special way. He's in a good mood despite the fact Allenby's here again and prepared scrambled eggs with bacon for breakfast while I was trying to get back to here and now under the shower.
Dressed and trying to look as fresh as a dewdrop I sat down at the table and poured coffee for us which was amply rewarded by James with a kiss on my head.
"You are so cute in the mornings!"
I don't know why he always says that.
He says that regardless of the fact if I'm grumpy, tired, wrinkled with sleep or humming a tune.

I never feel cute in the mornings.
I never feel cute at all.
And you know why?
I am not cute, that's all.

James looked as neat as a pin and was humming Bones serving the eggs.
"You are so good-humored in the mornings. And cute! And spick and span."
He sipped his coffee and smiled at me. "Of course I am good-humored. I'm with you!"
I blushed and just beamed at him. Now I was definitely cheerful.
We left at half past seven. Isn't it atrocious how early he always wants to be at work?

When we arrived and signed in Debbie's beam was almost unbearable. You can tell me what you want - she has a crush on him. And she is not the only one. This should not bother me, I know. And...it doesn't. No. Really. It doesn't bother me.
A new case was already waiting for me and later I'm in hell, id est clinic duty.
As I entered my office I was greeted by a biiiiig Starbucks Caramel Latte and a Reuben sandwich without pickles. Was that Granger doing a good deed again? How odd.
The clover was still asleep and I had no objections to curl up in bed again.
I forced myself to look through the file.
My new patient is a baby of 6 months. The little girl shows sypmtoms such as irritability, inexplicable crying, fevers, limb stiffness, seizures, feeding difficulties and vomiting. I don't know why this case wasn't passed to pediatrics.
But it's better than clinic duty and maybe it will be interesting. Who knows?

More about it later.
And root for me!
I don't want to meet Allenby!

Orpheus

Good morning!
Do you know David Sylvian?
I'm just listening to his album Secrets of the beehive and I love this song.
I have to show you, really!

New Year's Eve

Before I tell you about New Year's Eve I should inform you that the poor guy suffers from Budd-Chiari syndrome, the clinical picture caused by occlusion of the hepatic vein or inferior vena cava. Examples of occlusion include thrombosis of hepatic veins and membranous webs in the inferior vena cava.
Several studies have attempted to predict the survival of patients with Budd-Chiari syndrome. In general, nearly 2/3 of patients with Budd-Chiari survive 10 years.
We now try to treat him with sodium restriction, diuretics to control ascites, anticoagulants such as heparin and warfarin, and general symptomatic management. Liver transplantation will be needed, I suppose.

James is pissed off because he will have to see You-Know-Who in a few minutes and all my attempts could not brighten up his mood. I'm curious how he will behave and if he offers an excuse.

But now...let's tell you about New Year's Eve.

Foreman and Chase arrived at about 6.30 pm and I answered the door.
"Hey...even more casual than usual!", Foreman grinned and looked at me from from top to bottom. I wore my beige Irish turtleneck pullover and dark brown corduroy trousers accompanied by the inevitable sneakers.
I looked down at me. "Erm...was there a dress code or why is that so funny?"
Chase snickered. "It's not funny. You just look...cute!"
"HAHA!", I gnarled and let them in.
It was really funny to see how careful Chase sat down and supported his bum with cushions. I chose the right needles, I think. And the Chase survival kit was huge!
I couldn't help but giggle when I saw Chase sitting down. He frowned but Foreman laughed and patted his shoulder. "We couldn't think to get away with this. So bear it like a man, hon."
We had a really funny evening I have to admit laughing about my revenge and having weird conversations. Chase was not really amused when he asked for munchies and got the pencil box...

And of course there was an embarassing moment as well. (Okay, we had loads of alcohol, so there were many, but this one was supposed to be embarassing.)
Chase had the idea to show embarassing things from our past and brought his old Yu-Gi-Oh cards and I almost laughed my ass off. Gawd, I never expected him to collect such crap.
Foreman went pink when he showed us two tattered editions of Jane Eyre and Sense and Sensibility which clearly showed that he read them time and again.
"Now it's your turn!", Chase insisted. "You two definitely have embarassing things from your past here!"
I chose to give Jim the advantage and watched him disappearing into the bedroom. When he came back he brought a photographic album and we all thought of childhood photographs showing him as a chubby little boy (I never saw his childhood photographs). But no...those photos were taken at the congress 10 years ago where we first met. And I was on every single photograph.
James blushed. "I...wanted to hold on to you by these photos. I...well...I didn't know by then if I'll ever see you again..."
It was my turn to blush now and I had to blink back a few tears. That wasn't embarassing at all. That was so sweet! Even Chase and Foreman were moved.
James wanted to pack it away already but I wanted to see all of the pictures. And guess what?
There was one we must have taken by self timer. It was us. Kissing!
I went pink and stammered something disjointed. "But...but...I...erm...um...did that really happen?"
James looked straight into my eyes. "Well...I told you so, didn't I? And you clearly see it happened."
I shook my head. "We've been so...dumb..."
"Hey", Jim said and lifted my chin. "But at long last we had our happy end..."
I smiled at him and nodded. "That's what counts..."
We softly kissed and I hoped everyone forgot it was my turn now.

"House? It's your turn now", Foreman remembered me when we parted. Rats!
I sighed, went into the bedroom and rummaged in our wardrobe until I found a small black agenda. Flipping through the sides I knew it was what I was looking for and came back to the sitting room with it.
"Okay...here you are..."
It was a kind of diary in which I scribbled anything I did with James years ago. The last entry was from shortly before my infarction, we've been fishing then. There was even a sketch of James I once did and some photos showing us both.
I shifted uncomfortably while the others looked at it and grabbed it back as soon as I could. Doing so a folded piece of paper fell out of the agenda and the most embarassing thing appeared - my poem.

The rest of the evening was pleasant and fun, although we watched Maurice and The Secret Garden. And I have to confess....I liked both movies...
We were so absorbed in the crappy horror movies Chase brought we almost missed midnight. I fought with the champagne bottle and was unable to open it. Jim failed, too and finally Foreman managed to open that damn bottle one minute past midnight with a loud popp. We poured the champagne, clicked glasses and greeted the new year with a deep kiss. (Of course Jim and me and Foreman and Chase....NOT all four!)
I don't know how we managed it but we went outside to watch the fireworks, came inside again and emptied six bottles of champagne! No wonder I fell asleep on the sofa around 1 am or 1.30 am. Chase fell asleep beside me and it was quite annoying waking up with him laying at my back.
After all I heared Foreman must have had a nap in the bathtub and Edward came to visit us just to find us all except James fast asleep.
He said he almost did something stupid. And I wonder what it was. You better pray to the grace of God it has nothing to do with James, Ed!!!!

At work again and an unwelcome surprise

Mood: tired and already cranky
Weather: clear and around 45°F
Drinking: coffee
Eating: cereals with milk
Listening to: Here comes the rain again - The Eurythmics

Early morning at Princeton Plainsboro Teaching Hospital.
I'm grumpy and just want my second cup of coffee in the morning.
But what happened?
I entered my office hectically followed by an oh so good-humored Granger. D'oh!

"Gooooooooood mooooooooooooooooorning, Dr. House!!! And a Happy New Year to you!", she exclaimed and I wasn't quick enough to escape, so she hugged me with oomph.
"Ugh", I just launched out until she freed me. "Yes...um...Happy New Year Miss Granger..."
I rearranged my sportscoat, slammed my backpack to the floor and sat down at my desk.
That was when I spotted the plant pot with trefoil.
I stared and pointed at it.
"What on earth is that?!"
Granger smiled at me. "Clover!"
"I'm not a bit dim. I know that it's clover. But why is it here?", I grunted.
She beamed. "To wish you a Happy New Year. It shall bring you luck."
"U-hu", I nodded. "But there's something wrong with it. Look at the leaves. They're folded."
Granger bent down and examined the trefoil. She carefully caressed it and smiled again. "No, there's nothing wrong with it. It's still asleep."
"Asleep, huh?" I asked with a quirk of my eyebrow.
Granger nodded. "Yes. Asleep. It's still dark outside but now you made light in your office so I'm sure it'll soon wake up and unfold it's leaves. And now I'll bring you your coffee."
She hurried out of the office to return with my red mug filled with black coffee and sugar. I took the mug and nodded a Thank You. Was she on drugs? So cheerful in the morning? After the week off she had? It almost seemed as if she missed us.

I sipped my coffee and flipped through the file Cuddy promised to await me but couldn't read anything 'cause I heard a yell from the 'doctor next door'.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!"
I startled and looked up, then hobbled as fast as I could into Jim's office.
"Hun?", I asked opening the door. "Everything okay with you? Did you hurt yourself?"
He stared at me, shook his head, jumped up and grabbed my arm.
"What..., I began and was hauled out of the office.
"We have to talk to Cuddy!", he said between his teeth.
I was just hurled through the hallway and tried not to stumble with a more than puzzled expression on my face until we reached Cuddy's office.
He entered without knocking and trailed me behind him.
"CUDDY!", he yelled and she startled in addition to her surprise about our demeanor.
"Happy New Year Dr. House and Dr. Wilson!", she said calmly.
"Happy????", he cursed. "Happy??? How can a year be happy that starts like that???"
I looked puzzled from one to another and he pointed at me.
"See? And you didn't even bother to inform Greg about it!"
I opened my mouth to say something but was hushed by his index finger on my lips. "Sh, hun...I'm sure everything will be alright."
"If you are talking about Dr. Allenby", Cuddy began, "really everything is alright!"
"Allenby???", I exclaimed and stared at her. "What?"
Jim put his arm around my shoulder. "Yes...Allenby. He resumes work at 9 am today. Cuddy told me so by e-mail..." He glared at her and I looked blank.
Cuddy closed her eyes for a few seconds. "I can hand you a detailed account. He is said to be completely cured! And everyone deserves a second chance. He's a good doctor, you know that."
"He nearly raped Greg! He tried to kill me! He tried to kill Chase and he abducted Greg! And now you want us to work with him again???"
I still wasn't able to utter anything and just looked from one to another.
"He is completely cured!", Cuddy insisted. "And if there is the slightest suspicion he's up to it again he will be fired."
Jim made a fist and closed his eyes. "I don't think this will work", he said and hurled me out of the office again.
Trying to keep in step with him I stumbled behind him. "Could you stop this?", I asked.
He stopped short. "Huh?"
"You are hauling me all along the corridor", I complained. "Remember I'm crippled?"
Jim blushed slightly. "Sorry, dear", he mumbled and followed me into my office. "I'm just in such a rage. This is unbelievable!"
We sat down on my couch and stared into thin air a few minutes. Jim then held me close and kissed my forehead. "Please...don't wait too long if you think he behaves odd. Tell it at once, hun."
I nodded and snuggled to him. "Mhmmm...I'll do...want to stay a while and close the blinds?"
With gladness I saw he already grinned again. "I'd love to but have a patient now. I'll hark back to this later..."
I smiled at him. "Please do so!"
He left with a soft kiss and I tried to get it into my head that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named was back. After a while I shrugged and thought of killing him slowly with an unverifiable poison if he ever dared touching me again.

I arose and returned to my desk. Sitting down I noticed the clover now was awake and smiled without wanting to. "Good morning", I thought and opened the file again.
The patient was a young man of 28 with hepatomegaly and ascites. He suffered from heavy vomiting and lethargy so that I thought of the rare Reye's syndrome. Hyperactive reflexes seemed to indicate stage two and I called Chase, Cameron and Foreman to my office and asked them to bring coffee.
No ten minutes later they arrived and Foreman poured the coffee.
I already scribbled on the whiteboard.
"Any ideas?", I asked and looked at them expectantly. "Reye-Johnson syndrome? Differential diagnosis please!"
"Hmmm...", Chase frowned, "headache, vomiting, confusion and drowsiness could be caused by a viral encephalitis..."
I nodded. "But no stiff neck so far."
"What about a drug overdose?", Cameron asked.
"Nope...", I answered shortly. "Head injury can also be precluded."
"Renal failure?", Foreman asked.
I looked through the file and shrugged. "No sign of IgA nephritis, glomerulonephritis, chronic pyelonephritis and urinary retention so far."
A collective sigh later everyone looked at the whiteboard again.
"Fine then!", I finally said. "Check if he has an upper respiratory tract infection or chicken pox!"
They left and I thought about the case.

Three cups of coffee later it was obvious it wasn't Reye-Johnson. We visited the patient and learned that he also suffered from severe upper abdominal pain and jaundice.
"Look for elevated liver enzymes", I told Chase as we left him. "Cameron, you check creatinine, urea, electrolytes, LDH. Foreman - CT and MRI."
Off they were and I'm now waiting for the results.

Happy new year!

God...
Embarassing.

On New Year's Eve (to be precise after the fireworks) I discovered a poem I wrote years ago. I really forgot about it - I thought I never wrote a poem before when I did the one for James.

Heck, and everyone had to see it: James, Chase and Foreman - they all read it!
Well, it nearly brought James to tears but I still think it's embarassing.
He told me to show it here. Okay, I obey and do so.

It was written shortly after my infarction and I felt totally lost of course.

The Untouchable

My mind is going astray,
Dark fog it covers my road.
Almost forgot that way leads on to way -
My thoughts they wander abroad.

My light is dimmed
If it ever shone,
My wings are trimmed,
I feel all alone.

My innermost thoughts now I hide.
The Untouchable I fear I become.
Behind thick walls I hide.
Would just the pain vanish and be gone.

I know it is you I am longing for,
But how could I ever tell you?
Feelings I will share nevermore,
But still hope you'll enkindle me anew.

Alone I stand and hide my fear.
No one reaches me from now.
"Please, do help me out of here!",
I go down on my knees and bow.

Strange memories are rushing through my mind.
Could it be true?
You, loving and ever so kind
Made me all brand-new.

Better I hide it all
Inside of me.
Maybe you will hear my call,
Nevertheless knowing I love thee.

Gosh, I'd love to hide behind bushes now!
We're off to hospital now and I will write down my entry about New Year's Eve later.